Tedium - Lord of the Ring Prevention 🍹

Today in Tedium: When we drink beverages, often those beverages have to live in somewhere, and putting them on top of a wood table simply will not do. The container of that cold beverage you’re drinking is likely to condense all over the place, leaving a watery puddle in its wake. Putting it on top of wood, or marble, or any other surface, is simply a bad idea—and it’s an even worse one if that container has been recently spilled, leaving a mess all over the place. The hero of this story is the drink coaster, which can capture the condensation and ensure your fancy table is safe from the elements. But based on a quick search of Google Patents, simply being a coaster is no longer enough fro many coasters. It must do more—logic be damned. Today’s Tedium talks drink coasters, beer mats, and urinal coaster patents. — Ernie @ Tedium

Today’s GIF is from a guy who pulled off a fun beer coaster flip trick. It currently has 18 views on YouTube; let’s see if this link changes that.

A Moscow Mule on a drink coaster. (Alex Plesovskich/Unsplash)

The lineage of the modern beer coaster takes influence from a number of drink receptacles

What we think of today as the modern drink coaster borrowed concepts from a number of different areas, all of which came to prominence in the 17th and 18th centuries.

The first is the saucer. As the name of the small plate implies, it was originally used for sauces, but starting in the early-to-mid 18th century, it became more commonly used for tea cups, itself a concept imported from China as tea gained Western acceptance. (The cup’s handle is a Westernized concept; it originally came without one.)

Eventually, the saucer gained its defining characteristic, the small ring in the middle where the teacup goes, around that time. The way we used the saucer has changed during that time as well. For example, it was once customary to drink the tea from the saucer itself, rather than just from the cup, where it might be too hot to stand.

In fact, there’s a famous (and likely apocryphal) anecdote between George Washington and Thomas Jefferson that leans on this specific use of the saucer to explain why the United States needs a Senate:

“Why,” asked Washington, “did you just now pour that coffee into your saucer, before drinking?”

”To cool it,” answered Jefferson, “my throat is not made of brass.”

“Even so,” rejoined Washington, “we pour our legislation into the senatorial saucer to cool it.”

Next up is the aforementioned wine coaster, which works slightly differently from the modern coaster, and was largely intended to make it easy to move a wine bottle or decanter around the table without having to lift it. As a 1928 issue of Popular Science notes (crediting Washington for the invention), the device gained its name because of the fact that it has a roller at the bottom, which allows the device to “coast” along the table wherever the bottle is needed.

The third such object, called a beer mat, came about a century later, from Germany, where it was originally called a bierdeckel. According to the British Beermat Collectors Society, the object was originally produced in cardboard by a German paper mill called Friedrich Horn, and quickly innovated on by Robert Sputh, who produced absorbent pads not dissimilar to what you find today.

A whole pile of drink coasters, many used for advertising. (Thomas Backa/Flickr)

As Condé Nast Traveler notes, the object is an example of a device made for the average person, rather than one for upper classes (they would have used beer steins, with handles and lids, instead).

The design also proved useful in another way, allowing for quick printing, giving us one of the common aspects of the modern coaster—advertising, which was still a relatively new concept at the time.

Eventually, the modern coaster, not always made of paperboard, evolved in new and unusual ways, many of which have been patented. A shocking number, in fact.

When I was starting out on my research for this piece, I made the realization that drink coasters had a surprisingly complex array of entries in the U.S. and global patent offices, some of which highlight genuine technical innovations, while others seem to be embracing the true novel nature of the drink coaster.

There are so many of these that we honestly could have made it the whole piece and been done with it, and honestly, I think we’re just going to say screw it and make the rest of a piece a long list of a bunch of coaster patents. May your drink be well-kept and not directly on any sensitive surfaces.

Enjoy, potentially with a beverage on a coaster.

Solving the basic problems everyone has. (Google Patents)

A “Cling resistant drink coaster”

The year filed: 1999

The year granted: 2000

Patent office: U.S.

What the coaster does: Ever pick up a glass and find that the coaster sticks to it, creating a messy annoyance? This coaster tries to resolve the issue by adding a mesh layer to ensure the coaster doesn’t do its job too well.

Notable passage from the patent filing: “Indeed, even Greek mythology mentions the inconvenience of unabsorbed moisture encountered by the Hellenic deities as they consumed their various libations on the heights of Olympus. And today it is common to see inconvenienced bar patrons struggle with coasters which do not adequately dispose of adherent moisture and which cling to glasses, cans, bottles and any other containers bearing or producing condensation and, subsequently, leaving potentially damaging moisture on surfaces.”

Random fact: This patent filing is the only one credited to Douglas Kvalvog.

Someone’s going to look at this bargin-bin CD and it’s going to turn into some band’s big break. (Google Patents)

A “Compact disk drink coaster”

The year filed: 1997

The year granted: 1998

Patent office: U.S.

What the coaster does: Ever use a floppy disk as a coaster? The inventor of this device went one further to reuse wasted compact discs as solidly manufactured, reusable drink coasters.

Notable passage from the patent filing: “All these rejected compact discs create an environmental waste problem. At this time there is no viable way of completely recycling rejected compact discs. There is also a need for decreasing the dependency upon foreign crude oil. Crude oil is a material component of the plastic used in compact discs. Further, there is a need for drink coasters which protect the surface of furniture that are attractively styled and can be easily stored. Accordingly, there is a clearly felt need in the art for a compact disc drink coaster which can be attractively styled, easily stored, serve as a method for recycling rejected compact discs, and decrease dependency upon foreign crude oil by using existing plastic material.”

Random fact: The patent was co-filed by an experienced and still-active patent attorney, Donald J. Ersler, who only has one other patent to his name as an inventor—a device that pops pimples.

The company that went on to develop this unusual device has a technology that allows cars to charge without being plugged in. It all started here, I guess. (Google Patents)

“Wireless energy transfer for promotional items”

The year filed: 2012

The year granted: Abandoned

Patent office: U.S.

What the coaster does: This is a weird one, but the coaster, essentially is used as a wireless charging mechanism for a nearby smartphone. The patent filing is very complex and only mentions the use of the drink coaster in a few parts.

Notable passage from the patent filing: “Given that the electronics required for power transfer may be completely enclosed in a housing, wireless power transfer may be safe and efficient even in the presence of liquids, high humidity environments, over large temperature excursions and the like. In embodiments, power transfer may be achieved when drinks, liquids, food, dust, and the like, are spilled on the coasters or source resonators. In embodiments, wireless resonators that are in sealed enclosures may be cleaned using normal cleaning methods, including methods that completely submerge the resonator housings in water, such as in a dishwasher cleaning cycle and/or immersion in chemical cleaners. In embodiments, wireless power transfer can be achieved when any or all of the resonators in watertight enclosures are immersed in liquids.”

Random fact: The company that developed this patent filing, WiTricity Corp., is currently pitching a much more useful technology that can wirelessly charge a car in a specific parking space without ever plugging it in. By the way, this is not the only drink coaster-adjacent patent filed by WiTricity.

This design has quite the lineage. (Google Patents)

“Rolling drink coasters”

The year filed: 2021

The year granted: Still pending

Patent office: U.S.

What the coaster does: This coaster has wheels that allow the drink to travel with you, which is not exactly a new idea.

Notable passage from the patent filing: “Advantageously, the rolling drink coasters as described herein are capable of securely storing and holding a beverage container in an upright position and are also mobile due to the inclusion of one or more rollers or wheels that protrude from the underside of the rolling drink coasters. The structure and design of the rolling drink coasters, as described in one or more non-limiting embodiments, is unique because the rolling drink coaster is designed in a manner to be sturdy and to prevent the beverage container from toppling over when located within the inner compartment or tray of the rolling drink coaster. Further, the rolling drink coasters, as described in one or more non-limiting embodiments, include stabilizing pieces distributed around the interior of the rolling drink coaster that act to support and grip the sides of the beverage container to keep the beverage container upright and in place within the rolling drink coaster.”

Random fact: This is literally the same type of invention that George Washington is credited for coming up with for wine bottles nearly 250 years ago. I guess we’ve come full circle.