Most goal setting is a cluster of mental masturbation, wrapped in wishful thinking, with a big shiny bow of “if you dream it, you can achieve it” thrown on top. A very public human I won’t name sent me his annual goal-setting document. It was 23 pages. I politely declined its utility. THAT is the problem with most humans. If you attempt to do it all, you will, in fact, do none of it.
This year, unless the way things have gone in the past have given you everything you want, maybe try breaking the cycle.
An itty-bitty bonus for those who still insist on a goal-setting exercise…
MENTAL MODEL
The Misogi Challenge
A Japanese ritual with one idea... you do something so hard for one day that it profoundly impacts the next 364. You forget the world of to-do listing ourselves to a shallow grave filled with shallow accomplishments and you take one giant cliff jump.
Setting goals is important but I go back again and again to one idea. What is the one thing I could do that would make everything else so much easier?
Marcus Elliott, the owner of P3, popularized this concept in the US (either him or Jesse Itzler, I heard it third party, so IDK) and this quote of Marcus’s rang true:
“Take on challenges that radically expand your sense of what’s possible. There are just two rules: you have a fifty percent chance of success at best, and it doesn’t kill you…
The idea is instead of wishing, what if you do one thing so miserable everything else pales by comparison? What if you did one thing so memorable the year would stand the test of time?
Removing the Impurity
Let me take you into the world of the misogi, an ancient Japanese practice for cleansing and welcoming in all that is good. I’ll tell you a secret. Years ago, I decided to do my own misogi… and it changed everything for me.
Misogi translates as "water cleansing". It is a Japanese Shinto spiritual practice followed by practitioners year after year. On sacred sites all over Japan, you’ll see pilgrims trekking up hills and down valleys to finally find themselves alongside freezing waterfalls streaming from the sky.
When I first visited Japan, I was enraptured as I watched men and women in kimonos or fundoshi (loincloths) pray, fast, and sweat.
Worshippers at Kiyotaki Falls near Otaki PHOTOGRAPH BY BEN WELLER
They enter the waterfall chanting the phrase harai tamae kiyome tamae rokkon shōjō (祓い給え清め給え六根清浄), asking the kami (spirit) to wash away the impurity from the six elements that make up the human being: the five senses and the mind. Each group is a bit different. Each misogi unique. Surreal.
In our modern lives, we live so easily. Food delivered. Work done on keyboards. Labor in the gym.
When was the last time you truly struggled and did something so hard you thought you might cry... or die? I couldn’t name a time. But then I read words like these:
“This is about testing your abilities in a foreign environment. The more blind, the more bold and adventurous the effort. It’s not a ride at Disneyland or a Tough Mudder… It’s a personal quest designed by you. And it’s really fucking hard. You have a 50 percent chance of success, at best.”
I love that idea. What if success isn’t even the goal? Just trying it is.
HOW I WOULD PLAY IT
My Misogi
I did my first misogi climbing the icy mountainsides of Mt. Baker.
I was miserable. Thought I might actually die. I’m still not convinced I wasn’t being dramatic. Small itty-bitty tiny detail: I am horribly afraid of heights and hate the cold.
So, ice climbing a 10,000 ft mountain probably not my brightest idea.
After our first day of 10-hour days backpacking, carrying our own fecal matter, and switching between jackets as it rains, until we are somehow both sweating and freezing, we arrive at base camp. I am obviously less than thrilled about it.
I’m with a group of girls and none of us have prepared for this. We bought our gear quite literally a few weeks prior and most of us have never hiked a serious mountain. I am, between us girls, regretting my decision.
We pack into tiny frostbitten tents to sleep before the early morning call. Before the sun, we grab our spikes, ropes, and ice picks and start climbing.
It's, ahem, kinda steep.
As the snow starts to fall harder and harder and actual altitude sickness sets in, I wish I never heard of the godforsaken misogi.
We make it up and down the mountain. I don’t even make it to the summit. My feet are bleeding. My back is aching. My face is chapped.
But then something magical happens... as the next week comes, nothing seems as hard anymore. Warmly in my bed, coffee in hand, typing away on a keyboard, what could be so tough? My husband and I get into a fight. OK, no big deal. A big mistake is made in my business. Well, did anyone die? Nope. OK, figure-out-able.
A Universal Truth Emerged
**When you choose hard, life gives you ease.
When you choose ease, life gives you hard.**
So maybe this year, instead of writing goals for the life you want, write a plan for doing a thing you might hate. There’s even a joy in brainstorming the ridiculous:
Climb an icy mountain for three days
Stay up for 24 hours straight on a walking trail
Go to a sweat lodge and fasting retreat for three days
Hike the Pacific Northwest Trail
Drive for a week without a phone or compass to guide you and live off your cash and your wits
Get dropped off at a campsite for a few days and survive with only what you have
Go volunteer at a cattle ranch as a ranch hand for a week with their real workload
The universe is funny. It wants to teach us through struggle, and rewards sacrifice with abundance. Hard choices, easy life. Easy choices, hard life.
So choose your hard.
With the New Year upon us…
Whatever your sights are set on this year — see them through.
If you can just NOT handle not having a goal-setting exercise in 2023. Here are my 10 steps to goal setting that should fit on one page. Not 23.
Pull out a piece of paper and write down:
One word to describe the year ahead
What do I want? I use categories I call BRIMMM, aka fill me to the brim, baby. Six areas of my life.
Body
Relationships
Impact
Mind
Money
Mastery
What don't I want?
What is my why for this year?
Here’s my actual list of goals for 2020. They aren’t a novel. They aren’t broken down by days, weeks, and months. They are a north star. A compass just points after all.
Don’t aim to do it all, have it all. Start with that hard idea, Contrarians. Do that hard thing. And see just how easy life becomes…
Codie & Contrarian Crew
Written by Codie Sanchez, Edited by Rananda Rich and the Contrarian Team
Disclaimer – This is the “Be an adult” section. Everything mentioned above isn’t advice, just a recount of what I did. That said: This article is presented for informational purposes only. The opinions stated here are not intended to recommend any investment or provide tax advice. Neither are they an offer to sell or the solicitation of an offer to purchase an interest in any current or future investment vehicle managed or sponsored by Codie Ventures, LLC or its affiliates. All material presented in this newsletter is not to be regarded as investment advice, but for general informational purposes only. Day trading and investing do involve risk, so caution must always be utilized. We cannot guarantee profits or freedom from loss. You assume the entire cost and risk. You are solely responsible for making your own investment decisions. We recommend consulting with a registered investment advisor, broker-dealer, and/or financial advisor. If you choose to invest with or without seeking advice from such an advisor or entity, then any consequences resulting from your investments are your sole responsibility. By reading/sharing this newsletter or consuming our content on our other channels, you are indicating your consent and agreement to our disclaimer.
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