This is the Sunday Edition of Paging Dr. Lesbian. If you like this type of thing, subscribe, and share it with your friends.

Today I am coming to you in celebration of the two-year anniversary of Paging Dr. Lesbian. I’m excited about what the next year of this newsletter will bring, and I hope you’re still just as excited as readers. As a reminder, you can always upgrade to a paid subscription, which hugely supports the work I do here and will also get you more writing from me. Today I’m also announcing a new benefit for paid subscribers, which is monthly playlists curated by me. I don’t write about music as much as I’d like, but it’s a huge part of my life (as well as my writing process) and I thought this would be a good way to incorporate it into this newsletter. Plus, I love making playlists. 

In case you weren’t already aware, today’s newsletter is my second AMA (Ask Me Anything). I solicited your anonymous questions here and on social media and now I will answer them. This is a reward for your attentive readership, I suppose, because I don’t generally like talking about myself but I will make an exception just this once (or twice, really). I answered all of your questions that were actually posed as questions. (To the people who sent me compliments – thank you but, those are not questions!) I hope you find this informative and/or amusing. We’ll be back to our regularly scheduled programming next week. Happy new year! 

Dogs or cats?

I generally prefer dogs over cats but I also think we need to abolish arbitrary binaries like this!!! 

Is there an iconic movie about queer women you haven’t seen but plan to write about some time?

I know you asked about movies I haven’t seen but someday I really want to write an essay about The Children’s Hour (which I have seen) because I think it’s a really fascinating film. It’s a lesbian film from the 1960s starring Audrey Hepburn and Shirley MacLaine, if you can believe it. In terms of films I haven’t seen, I’m not sure I know of any I want to write about, but I will admit I haven’t seen Lisa Cholodenko’s High Art (it’s hard to find!) which is a classic from the ‘90s. Otherwise, I think my lesbian movie knowledge is fairly extensive. 

Have you ever cried during a movie?

I famously don’t cry during movies or TV shows and the only time I’ve ever cried while watching a movie as an adult is when I watched Coco on a plane. I felt like Cher in Moonstruck except instead of being at the opera I was watching a children’s movie 30,000 feet up in the air. I really do think that watching movies on planes makes you more emotional than you normally might be, and I’m not sure why. Comment below if you agree or are a scientist who can explain this phenomenon. (I also got slightly choked up watching E.T. on a plane recently, but E.T. always gets me. Little Drew!)

Best lesbian movie of all time go

I have such an aversion to picking favorites of anything – it legitimately stresses me out. My first thought is Portrait of a Lady On Fire, so I guess I’ll go with that. Honorable mentions go to Carol, Desert Hearts, and Bound. 

How to unpack all of the various polls, shade, light, politics of the term “lesbian” in 2023, looking at @lesbian_herstory who is sometimes surfacing good and sometimes stirring the pot…

I love this spicy question. I think the debate around the terms lesbian and queer is really interesting but in many ways pretty disheartening. The main thing I take issue with in terms of criticisms of the term lesbian is the assumption that it is somehow outdated, more restrictive, or more closed-off than the term queer. I don’t think that’s true at all, in part because I think identity terms like these can mean whatever you want them to mean but also because the history of lesbian community and culture is much more expansive – and certainly more radical – than we are often led to believe. 

It’s definitely not true that most lesbians are transphobic (though lesbian TERFs do exist, unfortunately), and I don’t think the term lesbian necessarily invokes binary gendered thinking in the ways one might assume. Non-binary lesbians do exist, of course, and trans people have always been a part of the lesbian community from the very beginning. 

I do think it’s troubling that some people feel the need to critique how others identify in general – ie. lesbians criticizing others for using the word queer or queer folks speaking down to those who identify as lesbians. Nonetheless, I think it’s certainly fair for lesbians to insist on being called lesbians rather than queer when the latter term might not connect with them. Personally, I try to use the term ‘queer’ or ‘sapphic’ when I’m talking about a broad community of people who may or may not identify as lesbians and ‘lesbian’ when I’m able to be more specific. I also named this newsletter Paging Dr. Lesbian in part because I’m interested in claiming a term that seems to have become derisive in a way I find unsettling. 

In regards to your question about all the tea on @lesbian_herstory, I do find all the polls and anonymous questions really interesting in part because they give us at least a little slice of what is on people’s minds these days. My general opinion on most things is that everyone just needs to chill out a little bit and maybe go outside and stare at a really cool tree, but sometimes a little bit of drama can be fun, as long as it's not hurtful. 

Favorite food?

Again, I really struggle to choose favorites. I’m a huge fan of tacos. I love every kind of Asian cuisine I’ve had the pleasure of trying. I will never turn down baby back ribs or any kind of fried chicken. 

Your last song on Spotify?

When I first received this question I think I was listening to Allison Russell’s album Outside Child. At this very moment, I am listening to Carry Me Home by Jorja Smith. Also, I use Apple Music, not Spotify!

I have covid, any show recommendations? 

I recently became obsessed with the series 9-1-1. (Also, I hope you don’t have Covid anymore!) It was created by Ryan Murphy and is an extremely silly show about firefighters and first responders. Angela Bassett (unfortunately) plays a cop and I don’t know what she’s doing on a Fox procedural, but she eats it up, obviously. (I generally think cop shows probably shouldn’t exist anymore but I also love procedurals so I find myself in a bit of a pickle.) There is also a lesbian firefighter and some truly unhinged plotlines. 

I also love His Dark Materials, which is a fantasy show on HBO. It stars Ruth Wilson (among others), and if you aren’t a Ruth Wilson stan yet, you should be. If you like mean mothers (and I mean mean) you will love this show. I also think Evil is totally brilliant, and Robert and Michelle King are geniuses. (You should also watch The Good Wife and The Good Fight if you haven’t already.) Person of Interest is one of my all-time favorite shows and I wish it got more love. It also happens to star Sarah Shahi.

Have you seen breaking bad

I have never seen this show, sorry. The only thing I really know about it is that Krysten Ritter stars in at some point. Season 1 of Jessica Jones (which also stars Krysten Ritter) is one of my all-time favorite TV seasons. 

Your celeb crush?

I probably could write a novel about this so I’m just going to tell you the first names that come to mind. I have loved Angeline Jolie since forever and will always be ride or die for her. I’m a big fan of Hayley Atwell, which I feel like is a fairly niche celeb crush but if you know, you know. (I once got up early to attend a Zoom seminar she hosted.) I’m obsessed with Padma from Top Chef. I once had Shay Mitchell as both my phone screensavers but I think I’ve grown past that now (no offense, Shay.) I do think Katie from MUNA and I should get married. I have loved Sarah Shahi since The L Word. And Rachel Weisz, of course. 

Who do you have pinned on imessage

Honestly, I didn’t know you could pin people on iMessage. I don’t organize my phone or my computer at all. I don’t have any of those little boxes for iPhone apps, none of the files on my computer are at all organized, and I have never once put an email into a folder or whatever people do to organize emails. I’m just vibing. 

Did you have an imaginary friend?

No, I never had one. I tried to get my friend to explain to me what it means to have an imaginary friend, and I honestly still don’t really get it. I suppose it’s possible I had one and forgot, but I don’t think so. I don’t really remember playing that many imagination-based games as a kid in general – perhaps I’ve always been a little too literal for that kind of thinking. 

Have any Netflix recommendations?

There are so many bad things on Netflix and everything gets canceled! But let me think of some good ones. I recently watched this new film called Mars One which was really great. It’s a Brazilian film and has a lesbian storyline. Personally, I am a fan of the series Lucifer, but it’s the kind of show you either love or hate. If you like goofy supernatural procedurals then it might work for you, but if you don’t, it might not be your jam. (There are also sapphics in the later seasons.) I would also highly recommend the French series Call My Agent! If you watch Killing Eve, you will recognize Camille Cottin, who plays an iconic bossy lesbian in the show. (There are also some incredible guest stars featured.) RRR is a totally epic (in every sense of the word) Tollywood film that’s now streaming on Netflix that you should definitely watch. The main character throws tigers at people!

Have you ever had any surgery?

Only oral surgery, because my mouth refuses to be normal. 

What’s the most lesbian animal?

I love this question. I’ve been pondering it for days now. I feel like cats would be the obvious answer but I’m not going to go there. Here’s what I’ve come up with instead: I think the most lesbian animal is a wolf – specifically a gray wolf. I’ll explain my reasoning. First of all, they mate for life, which is very lesbionic. They are also extremely social creatures and have complex systems of communication. (If there’s one thing lesbians do, it’s communicate.) Their habitats are wide-ranging but they are territorial in nature. They are feared by human beings and by livestock. (The former is also true of lesbians, less so the latter.) Their numbers are dwindling, which some people think is also happening to lesbians. I hope that sufficiently answered your question.

How do you feel about lesbians remaining friends with their exes?

I think it makes sense! I’ve heard people say this phenomenon is the result of the fact that lesbians lack boundaries, which I’m sure is true in some cases, but I also think that’s a pretty reductive explanation. I think a more relevant issue is the fact that the lesbian and queer community is pretty small, so if you stop talking to your exes you’ve lost a chunk of that community. The small size of the community also means it's more difficult to avoid exes, especially since there’s a lot of overlap in the dating pool. 

Would you ever get with me?

If you’re a paid subscriber, I will consider it. 

Snap?

I do not use Snapchat. If you must, you can follow me on Instagram, where I mostly post concert videos. 

One thing you can’t survive without?

Music is the first thing that comes to mind. I truly think it’s one the primary things that keeps me alive, apart from, you know, food and such. I listen to music all day long and I’m usually able to get myself out of a bad mood by putting on a great song. I would say going to concerts is also my all-time favorite activity outside of the house. 

Your favorite part of your body?

I’m going to say my eyes. They’re green, which is nice, I guess. 

Craziest pick up line that worked?

I don’t use pickup lines. I’m not that suave. I’ll quote Kate Moennig here and say that the best game is no game. 

Introvert or extrovert?

Definitely an introvert. When I don’t get ample time and space to myself I feel a little crazy. 

What have you gotten detention for?

I have never gotten detention. I was busy taking AP classes and driving everyone around in my Prius. I never missed a single day of school in high school or in college. You can decide for yourselves whether or not that is cool or deeply sad.