Happy Friday? It's Dan DeFrancesco, and these days I get the "Friday scaries" more than the "Sunday scaries," knowing that I have a full weekend of keeping a 10-month-old entertained. (It's OK. Her feelings won't be hurt. She can't read.)

Fun-Fact Friday: Archaeologists discovered a 2,000 year-old fast-food joint in Pompeii.

On tap, we've got stories on a fintech with some high-profile backers trying be an alternative to BNPL, everybody wants in on the Salesforce campaign, and the best US restaurants, per Yelp.

But first, I don't know what the hell I'm workin' for!

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1. Death of an investment banker.

Why am I trying to become what I don't want to be?

-Biff Loman and every investment-banking analyst (probably)

Insider's Emmalyse Brownstein recently reported on salaries within private equity, including what top firms like Blackstone, KKR, and Oaktree are offering 2024 associates. The compensation is impressive, with some firms offering first-year associates nearly $200,000 in base comp alone. 

Emmalyse's story got me thinking: Does anyone actually want to be an investment banker?

Whether it's private equity, hedge funds, or venture capital, most young bankers want to eventually end up on the buy side. These days, I wonder if there is anyone left who aspires to be a lifer at an investment bank. 

If money is what motivates you, you're certainly better off on the buy side. Banker salaries will get you in first class, but the potential total comp at PE firms and hedge funds will get you flying private. 

And if having a good work-life balance is more your top priority, you're also better off on the buy side. PE firms have been known to grind through people, but nothing quite compares to life at an investment bank.

Perhaps the one point in the banks' favor is that they sit at the center of the financial world, one colleague pointed out to me. Working at a bank will give you a holistic view of the financial markets in a way that's just not possible on the buy side. 

But, to be honest, it doesn't matter how bad of a deal working at an investment bank might be. Like an overzealous bouncer at a college bar, banks are the annoying-but-powerful gatekeepers standing between you and your dreams. An investment bank's analyst program remains the go-to route to get your foot in the door on the Street.  

It'll be interesting to see how long the banks are able to maintain that position, however. If PE and hedge funds decided to aggressively court dealmakers out of college, the entire facade could crumble.

Don't agree? Let us know. You can ping Insider's senior editor Michelle Abrego or me with your thoughts.

Click here to read more about salaries being offered by top PE firms to 2024 associates.

In other news:

2. These celebrities are backing a fintech aimed at being a BNPL alternative. Rapper Lil Baby, actress Robin Wright, and former NFL star Odell Beckham Jr. have all invested in startup Kasheesh, which allows users to split a purchase across multiple cards. Here's the pitch deck it used to court these high-profile backers. And, in case you missed it, we've got more than 50 pitch decks used by founders to raise millions in funding.

3. Concerns about the cloud. Everybody on Wall Street is all in on the public cloud, but that may not be a good thing. A new report from the Treasury Department examines finance firms' reliance on the big three cloud providers (AWS, Microsoft Azure, and Google Cloud Platform), per The Wall Street Journal. And for more on how the public cloud is set to impact essentially every job across Wall Street, check out this pertinent Insider feature. 

4. Well, well, well...how the tables turn. FTX, which is trying to claw back donations made to politicians, is getting a taste of its own medicine as Robinhood is trying to buy back the $575 million worth of its own stock that was seized from the bankrupt crypto exchange's former CEO, Sam Bankman-Fried, the Financial Times reports. Meanwhile, the FT also has a play-by-play breakdown of FTX's blow up. Check it out here.

5. Everybody wants in on the activist fun with Salesforce. Dan Loeb's Third Point LLC is the latest activist to join the campaign against the software giant, The Wall Street Journal reports. Read more here.

6. The wealthy? Avoiding paying taxes? WHAT? All kidding aside, this deep dive by ProPublica is a fascinating look into how investment firms are helping the ultrarich save on taxes. Here's a breakdown of how they are doing it.

7. Are you ready for some (PE-backed) football! Valuations for NFL teams are getting so big that some are questioning whether the league will need to drop its restrictions around allowing institutional investors to buy teams, Bloomberg reports.

8. Schulman set to depart PayPal. Dan Schulman, the CEO of the payments giant, announced his plans to retire by the end of the year. More on that here.

9. The 50 best restaurants in the US, according to Yelpers. California, Texas, and Florida were the big winners while New York didn't have ONE restaurant make the list. Check out the entire list here.

10. These vitamins will give you the boost you need. Not sure what supplements are worth the hype and what's snake oil? We've got you covered. These vitamins are dietitian-approved to fight fatigue and give you an energy boost.

Curated by Dan DeFrancesco in New York. Feedback or tips? Email ddefrancesco@insider.com, tweet @dandefrancesco, or connect on LinkedIn. Edited by Jeffrey Cane (tweet @jeffrey_cane) in New York and Hallam Bullock (tweet @hallam_bullock) in London.