[Electric Speed] The courage to be disliked

A note from Jane

I recently finished reading The Courage to Be Disliked by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga. I can’t recall where I learned about this book, but it’s a fantastic read. It exposed me to Adlerian psychology, which I’d never heard of before, yet Adler seems as important as Freud, Jung, or any of his more well-known contemporaries. At its core, the book examines how all problems are interpersonal relationship problems.

It reminded me of an explosive work situation years ago, when I inadvertently antagonized a colleague. She never forgave my transgressions and even sent me a nasty email months later, on the day she left the company.

While it’s not an experience I wish to repeat, there was something quite simple and straightforward about it all. There was no way for me to redeem myself; no amount of apologizing would help. And once I saw that, it was possible to let it all go. There was nothing to fix. People feel their feelings, and you have no control over it.

Similarly, during a rough patch with a family member (I had written a personal essay that greatly upset her), I acknowledged her anger and hurt feelings, but didn’t argue. There was no way to make her see the situation as I did. So I just accepted it for what it was. I gained lasting peace from that decision: I was no longer trying to hide, fighting to win, or seeking to appease.

To give your novel its best shot in the marketplace, you need more than an intriguing story concept, a whiz-bang plot, and some fabulous characters—or even great writing. You need an emotionally affecting story core. Emotion in fiction can feel mysterious, even magical, but it’s generated via practical nuts-and-bolts craft techniques that anyone can learn. Susan DeFreitas will draw upon her 12+ years as a book coach and editor to share the secrets of long-form fiction that generates strong emotions in readers—and, in the process, creates raving fans.

In the last issue, I asked you to recommend Bluetooth speakers. Here’s what you said:

For Bluetooth speakers, my favorite to use is the Xfinity Rewards Frequency 2.0. ... It’s lightweight and I can take it pretty much anywhere and pair it to anything I want. As long as the paired device is within 26 feet, it plays pretty well. —Katelynn
I use a mini-size BUMP Bluetooth speaker. I can take it into the kitchen and listen to something on the computer while I’m making supper or cleaning up. It’s great! —Bookbind
JBL Flip 3 is great! —Alex Hoffman
I like my very portable easy-to-use Wonderboom speaker by Ultimate Ears. —Texatex
I use Fashionit U Micro Speaker around my work spaces. One is a good enough and powerful choice (and as a music enthusiast I can assure you my ears are picky). Two can be coupled for a full stereo sound.
The EWA A106Pro mini speaker has really great sound. I was skeptical when I saw its size, but I was pleasantly surprised. Great bass for a little speaker too. —Michelle Stockard Miller

Next question: Do you have a recommendation for a keyboard—whether wireless, mechanical, or something else? Hit reply to this message, or head on over to Discord to post your recommendation.

[Electric Speed] The courage to be disliked

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