The Cut - Are We All Secretly Co-sleeping?

When I was pregnant, I imagined the mother I’d be: a perfect image of maternal serenity. On my daughter’s second night home with us from the hospital, I remember placing her in the bedside bassinet and setting an alarm to wake and feed her in a few hours. Ah, I thought, everything is working out exactly as I’d hoped. Ten months later, that blind confidence haunted me. That night, she didn’t go to sleep. Nor the next. Nor the next. While she’d doze off in my arms or on my chest, as soon as I’d move to put her down, she’d start screaming. At the end of two weeks, I thought I was going to go insane. I’d dreamed of total connection. I got a conjoined nightmare.

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