Is your leadership at risk because of BMS?

Global and personal events can take an emotional toll on leaders who must learn to take care of themselves, create a culture of support and allow others to take the lead when necessary, writes Ruth Gotian, an assistant professor at Weill Cornell Medical College. In addition, Gary Cooper, founder, president and CEO of The Carolus Group, recommends that leaders temper emotions with the facts, check their ego during stressful situations and realize everyone is allowed to have a challenging day.

Put it into practice: Leaders can model the openness and vulnerability needed to get through tough times, writes Gotian. Gratitude is a go-to tool for Cooper because it's "contagious, which can only help get everyone to focus on more hopeful outcomes in times of strife."

"Boomer male syndrome" is a label consultant S. Chris Edmonds uses to define control-wielding bosses (no matter their gender or the era they were born in) who manage in a their-way-or-the-highway mode -- especially when it comes to working full-time out of the office again. "BMS-afflicted senior leaders lack empathy and vulnerability, fail to show curiosity about how to make their work culture better and demonstrate the inability to build mutually beneficial relationships with fellow leaders, employees and even customers" -- as well as exhibit a lack of trust, Edmonds says in this video.

Put it into practice: "The first step to curing BMS requires that senior leaders step back and observe the impact their old-school practices have on relationships, results and respect across their work cultures. The second step to curing BMS requires senior leaders to treat others with respect and validation, no matter where they work," Edmonds asserts.

Dissatisfied employees who leave often complain about bosses who listen selectively, never show gratitude and aren't interested in hearing feedback, writes organizational consultant Whitney Breer. These bosses need to learn humility -- "valuing and respecting others while realizing one's own limitations" -- which "can go a long way" toward keeping employees "engaged and thriv[ing]," Breer says, suggesting ways to practice humility.

Put it into practice: Leaders can better exhibit humility by sharing credit and naming team members' names for jobs well done, as well as expressing thanks for contributions, Breer writes. Good leaders also admit their mistakes and explain lessons learned, seek input to show they know the value of other people's opinions, and encourage and aid in the growth of employees.

The Honest Co.'s Carla Vernon joins other Black women who serve as CEOs in emphasizing the need for increased representation in leadership, explaining, "When I was young, I was really marked by the experience of having talented, brilliant, bright, charismatic, powerful Black women to look up to in a work setting."

Southwest Airlines, famous for allowing passengers to check two pieces of baggage free of charge, has posted two videos showcasing the more unusual items its baggage staff have seen on those conveyor belts. They include a stuffed giraffe, kayaks, a pool noodle and a bag bearing the words "emotional baggage."

Yesterday's poll results from Mike Figliuolo asked if you kept up with any of your high school or college friends, and I fell in the majority of those who don't. Several readers took the time to tell me about their own experiences.

Timothy Welsh, SmartBrief's director of strategic partnerships, says he lost touch with an old high school classmate who went into the Air Force, but now they live near one another and visit often.

David M. says he reconnected with a junior school friend in London after hearing his name on BBC radio and tracking him down. Even though his friend lives in Houston and he's in Scotland, they meet every few months over Zoom. "The time gap was 55 years, and the distance 5000+ miles -- just shows that it is never too late!" he notes.

Jenise H. says she found it an ironic juxtaposition of Tuesday's question about keeping up with old classmates and Monday's story about the benefits of monotasking. "I feel like looking backward is a form of multitasking and not living in the present," she says. However, she has leveraged her relationship with an old colleague a couple of times who has helped her land new roles.

Forming those relationships, whether with old school friends or former colleagues, is the key, says Center Leadership Coaching's Larry Center, who is still close to three high school friends who live nearby.

"Old relationships are often the most precious relationships because we share so much history together and can read each other's thoughts. It's no different when talking about leadership on the job -- the secret sauce is building, nurturing and sustaining relationships!"

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