Why it's sometimes best to remain in your comfort zone

Getting outside of your comfort zone and trying new things is a great way to grow, but there are times when you should stay there, experts say, such as when you're stressed out, under review, in need of a confidence boost, working in your area of expertise or it's just too risky. "When resources are tight -- whether it's time, money or people -- sticking to what you know works can help you get the most out of what you have," says author Henna Pryor.

Put it into practice: If you're happy in your job and not worried that AI or other technology will one day displace you, leaving your comfort zone isn't recommended unless you feel you might regret it, says Cheryl Naumann, chief human resources officer for the University of Phoenix. "The nagging feelings of missed opportunities and chances that you passed up may take a greater toll as time passes than living in discomfort for the short term," Naumann notes.

Engage your audience during a presentation by making them the hero of the story, showing them you relate to their pain points and offering your guidance and strategies that will help them overcome obstacles and achieve their dreams, writes Duarte's Phoebe Perelman. "By empathizing with your audience and offering support, you can draw them in, win them over, and ultimately, help solve their problems," Perelman notes.

Put it into practice: Every story needs an antagonist -- a challenge to overcome -- whether it's declining revenues, employee burnout or an ineffective process, Perelman writes. "Addressing an issue the audience faces not only helps them relate to you, but this sense of conflict also keeps them engaged as they become invested in how to overcome the challenge."

When leaders speak, team members tend to take their words as orders whether they are meant as such or not, write Vanderbilt University professor Kelly Goldsmith and executive coach Marshall Goldsmith, who suggest asking yourself, "Is it worth it?" before speaking because your words may affect the motivation of your team, for good or ill. They suggest following the advice of Alan Mulally, former CEO of Ford, who always asked if someone else was more qualified to speak on a given topic and ceding the floor to them.

Put it into practice: Carry that question, "Is it worth it?" home with you, the Goldsmiths suggest, asking if what you want to say will improve a family member's commitment. "[I]f the comment you're about to make will damage your relationship with a person you love, it is almost never worth it," they note.

In a joint interview this week, GM CEO Mary Barra and former IBM CEO Ginni Rometty talked about their leadership philosophies and how their view of being a woman in the C-suite has evolved over the years. They both downplayed their gender early on but later embraced their status when they realized they were role models for other women, or as Rometty put it: "People can't be what they can't see."

Tim Bushe began topiary art of the bushes around his own house at his wife's urging, and now cuts images of cats, squirrels, fish and even late British sculptor Henry Moore's "Reclining Nude" for neighbors all around his London neighborhood. The artful hedges have become a tourist attraction, and Bushe, an architect by trade, has leveraged the attention to raise money for charity.

One of the key things they teach you in homiletics class in seminary ("homiletics" is a fancy word for sermon writing) is to put the audience at the center. Talk to them about the problems they're experiencing,  the challenges they're facing and the place of joy and peace they want to get to. Christian ministers will use stories from the Bible and the life of Jesus to achieve this. Buddhist teachers will use Buddha's words. Muslims will use the Koran and the stories of Muhammad. Hindus may quote the Vedas. Metaphysical and New Age teachers will use just about anything that works to get the message across (I speak from experience here).

That doesn't mean you can't relate a story from your life, but you must make it relate in some way to the pain points and problems those in the audience are facing. We all share common challenges, so it's best to stick to those to make your presentation or talk relatable.

Every story needs an antagonist, too, something to challenge us that we can overcome. In my talks, the antagonist was always our ego and how it can deceive us on so many levels. In a business talk, Phoebe Perelman points to several possible antagonists, including a revenue decline, a rising competitor or employee burnout.

Your role as the speaker is to share your wisdom and experience, but it's also to spark within your listener a sense of empowerment and creativity. You're providing the tools they'll need to overcome the challenge, but you're also ready to show them how to use those tools effectively.

I always knew I had achieved this when someone would come up to me after a Sunday celebration and tell me the message hit home for me. I really knew I had hit my target when someone would come up to me and recall the lesson from a talk I had given years before. When your words stick with someone for a long time, you know you've told the story well.

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