Feeling insulted? Use these tools to reframe and forgive

Give yourself a break! Thirty-eight percent of you report not doing a good job of taking advantage of slower times of the year and giving yourself some rest. It can be hard to turn off the intensity of your regular approach to work but learn to cherish the slow times and let yourself rest and recover. The fast times will return -- I guarantee it.

By adjusting your pace and accepting a "breather" provided by the environment around you, you're letting your body and mind recover from periods of prolonged stress. That recovery is essential for your health and welfare. Being rested will also help you adapt more quickly when fast times emerge again.

Don't let yourself fall into the trap of continuing to push hard when everyone else is dialing down the intensity. You'll be sorry you didn't give yourself a break when everything starts moving rapidly again!

-- Mike Figliuolo is managing director of thoughtLEADERS, which includes TITAN -- the firm's e-learning platform. Previously, he worked at McKinsey & Co., Capital One and Scotts Miracle-Gro. He is a West Point graduate and author of three leadership books: "One Piece of Paper," "Lead Inside the Box" and "The Elegant Pitch."

Chef Dominique Crenn, the most decorated female chef in the US, has had a remarkable 2024, maintaining three Michelin stars for Atelier Crenn, earning one for Le Comptoir, and being named one of Time's 100 Most Influential People. Crenn emphasizes the responsibility that comes with recognition, supporting rising chefs through initiatives like the Girl Power Series and focusing on sustainability through her Bleu Belle Farm. "You want to be a chef? Then be a responsible chef," she says.

This year, research revealed that cats and dogs likely dream about daily experiences, dogs can detect stress through cortisol in sweat, and some Labrador retrievers have a genetic mutation that causes constant hunger. Cats that seem clingy might be bored, and a unique genetic mutation in some cats causes their tails to curl, affecting communication.

It's easy to get triggered when someone insults us. It reminds me of a time, many years ago, when I went to a workshop with a couple of authors who had written a book that sparked protests wherever they spoke. One of the authors said he coped by not taking anything a critic said personally. He recounted a story where a woman was inches from his face, yelling at him, and he said all he could think was, "What has hurt her so badly that something I wrote could trigger such anger?"

This author knew that when we get angry with another person, it's usually about us and not about them. What they said triggered something unhealed in us. Yelling back at the woman would have done no good and only deepened both her wounds and his.

Jonny Thomson's suggestion to follow Simone Weil's advice is sound. Weil believed that those who insult us or wrong us are acting from their pain and suffering. Instead of reacting in anger, Weil suggested using compassion, resisting retaliation and recognizing the dignity of the other person. This is what that author did. He spoke kindly to the angry woman, and while she remained angry, he didn't make the situation worse.

To practice this, try to pause and reflect whenever you feel wronged and ask:

• What pain or suffering may be causing this person to act this way?
• How can I respond in a way that affirms their dignity rather than causing more harm?
• Can I transform my hurt feelings into an opportunity for growth and empathy?

Weil's approach is not easy, but it can be profoundly transformative by helping us to prioritize love and understanding over vengeance or self-righteousness.

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