Crooked Media - What A Day: Fork in the DOGE

BY MATT BERG
& CROOKED MEDIA

MONDAY
FEBRUARY 24, 2025

“It just looks like an episode of ‘The Sopranos.’”

— Rep. Jim Himes (D-CT), on Trump’s demand that Ukraine hand over $500 billion in rare earth minerals… for nothing in return.

REPLY NONE

Elon Musk’s latest power play is going down in flames, as the first split opens up between the chainsaw-wielding gazillionaire and Trumpworld. Will it last?

Saturday night in Washington D.C. — a time when stressed out federal workers should’ve had a moment’s peace from President Donald Trump’s assault on their careers, perhaps to gather and knock back a couple stiff drinks. Instead, phones all over town started buzzing with texts: The White House sent an email blast, telling all federal workers to list five bullets “of what you accomplished last week” by Monday, 11:59 p.m. “This whole thing is bonkers, Matt,” one worker texted me. “We are in the wrong timeline.”

Was it real? Was it legal? Should people respond? The mysterious message came, shockingly, from “First Buddy” Elon Musk — who tweeted that anyone who doesn’t respond would be fired… even though the email doesn’t say that. In other words, if you missed his tweet, you might even get fired without knowing why. Federal workers are now suing Musk, claiming that he violated the law. What authority does he have to fire people, or issue these sorts of decrees?

“I have work to do 😭😭😭,” a second worker texted me. “Elon Musk is clearly a coward without a life or a real job.” Some workers typed their bullets so that the first letters spelled: “F ELON.” Another employee pointed out that Musk’s DOGE would have to sift through more than 10 million bullet points, a total "waste of time."

But a chasm soon opened between Musk and Trump’s MAGA-pilled cabinet officials.

FBI Director Kash Patel, Director of National Intelligence Tulsi Gabbard, and Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth each instructed their agency’s employees to not respond to the email. Remember, Trump chose these people because they’re ultra-loyal. Energy Secretary Chris Wright told workers last night that his department — and no one else — is responsible for reviewing their performance, per an email obtained by What A Day. They’re not supposed to push back on anything Trump wants to do.

Trump publicly defended Musk’s initiative today, telling reporters that it was “genius.” Shortly after, however, the White House told agencies that they can ignore the email, according to the Washington Post. DOGE will use AI to analyze responses that have been sent in, NBC News reports. “Everyone is working together as one unified team at the direction of President Trump. Any notion to the contrary is completely false,” White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt told the Post. Nothing says, “We’re all on the same page here,” as publicly disavowing the White House’s orders!

These chaotic three days signal fresh strains in MAGAworld. Trump has granted Musk near-total power to slash the federal workforce and save money (an effort that has failed, on the financial level, while unleashing widespread suffering). What just happened was important: Trump’s top officials just overruled the unelected tech mogul. The question now: Will they have the guts to do it again?

In a timely display, someone hacked the televisions at the Department of Housing and Urban Development to show an AI-generated video of Trump licking Musk’s bare feet. Disgusting, but accurate.

TRUE FIENDS

Even Elon Musk’s AI chatbot (what kind of hellscape are we living in?) believes that Donald Trump is on Russia’s side.

In one week, Trump has overhauled America’s foreign policy toward Moscow, calling Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy a “dictator without elections,” demanded that his country hand over $500 billion worth of natural resources, and cozied up to Russian dictator Vladimir Putin.

The United States chose today, the third anniversary of Russia’s invasion of Ukraine, to vote alongside Russia, North Korea, and other dictatorial countries against condemning the Kremlin for its actions — a stunning about-face on the world stage. It sends a clear message to Zelenskyy: The U.S. isn’t with you anymore, even in the face of Ukraine’s dire straits.

The most powerful nation on earth has switched sides, according to Grok, Musk’s artificial intelligence chatbot on X. Trump’s recent statements are in “alignment with Kremlin propaganda,” the chatbot told me last night.

“Trump’s ‘dictator’ label mirrors Russian disinformation efforts, which aim to delegitimize Zelenskyy by questioning his mandate and portraying him as an authoritarian,” Grok wrote. “Trump’s rhetoric aligns more closely with Moscow’s talking points than with the reality of Ukraine’s situation.”

Over the weekend, Zelenskyy offered to step down as president if Ukraine is allowed into NATO and Putin agrees to end the war — a largely symbolic gesture. Today, Putin called Chinese leader Xi Jinping, an ally throughout Russia’s invasion. The pair are “true friends,” Xi said.

I asked Grok whether Trump’s in their friend category. “Both leaders likely see Trump as useful rather than a true friend,” it responded. Okay, please never make me write “Grok” in this newsletter again.

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WHAT ELSE?

Donald Trump tapped right-wing lunatic Dan Bongino to be the deputy director of the FBI. This guy is another legitimate nutcase who regularly harasses reporters and once said that his “entire life right now is about owning the libs.” Between agency Kash Patel and this guy we’re sure the FBI is in for a normal, productive four years.

Israel sent tanks into the occupied West Bank for the first time in decades, telling fleeing Palestinians that they aren’t allowed to return to their homes. Palestinian officials called this move a “dangerous escalation” in an area where 3 million Palestinians live under military rule.

Tech bro Vivek Ramaswamy has officially entered the Ohio governor’s race. His main position is basically the same as DOGE — cutting spending and reshaping the state government — which he was booted from. You can tell he’s just sad that he was kicked out of the club by a dude who pays other people to play video games for him.

Apple announced plans to hire 20,000 workers and invest $500 billion in the United States over the next four years. It’s exactly the type of investment Trump wants tech giants to pledge, and could push more companies to follow suit.

Lester Holt is stepping down as the anchor of NBC Nightly News after eight years in the post. He’ll still be an anchor with “Dateline.” Oh come on, who else has a soothing voice that can deliver the bad news to me every night? There’s enough podcasts in the world… but I still want him to start one.

DHS Secretary and dog killer Kristi Noem admitted that Trump specifically asked her to run $200 million anti-immigration ads that repeatedly thank him for the immigration crackdown. Nothing says “I am a confident leader” like “please spend hundreds of millions on an ad praising me.”

Five-time Grammy award winner Roberta Flack, the legendary singer of “Killing Me Softly With His Song,” died today. She was 88 years old.

THERE'S MORE WHERE THAT CAME FROM

Another week, another Trump scheme to gut the government — this time by coming for the workers who actually keep it running. We’re talking food inspectors, mail carriers, and even those serving in the military. On the latest episode of Assembly Required, Stacey unpacks the mass layoffs. Then, AFL-CIO President Liz Shuler joins to explain why this GOP power grab won’t just hurt workers — it’ll backfire. Plus, what you can do to protect workers. Listen to Assembly Required now, wherever you get your podcasts, or on YouTube!

Iconic actor and activist Jane Fonda took a stand against MAGA at the SAG Awards last night. “Make no mistake, empathy is not weak or woke,” Fonda said. “And, by the way, woke just means you give a damn about other people.” As if we needed another reason to love her.

Scientists are using underwater drones to monitor and protect artificial reefs, which could help attract new wildlife and help the local environment.

New research suggests that humans may have lived alongside giant sloths and mastodons for millennia, challenging past assumptions that they quickly killed off those animals. I know scientists have thought about bringing back wooly mammoths… Can we please put giant sloths on that list?