Messages
7/28/2021
0 : 44
What A Day: Whistle stop boor
A perfect warm summer night for an Ice Cream Task Force. Tuesday, July 27, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -A MAGA reporter on Liberal Censorship at a pro-insurrection press conference Four
7/27/2021
0 : 54
What A Day: Next of Kinz
We do not pretend to know what is happening in Atlanta. Monday, July 26, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Peter Doocy, who will freak when he finds out he works for Fox News As Republicans
7/23/2021
20 : 44
What A Day: Ivey seen enough
Take it to Telegram, you green-thumbed sickos. Friday, July 23, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS, BRIAN BEUTLER, & CROOKED MEDIA -A relatable Senate staffer on the state of the infrastructure deal As America
7/23/2021
0 : 34
What A Day: Bretter late than never
On the bothsides of history. Thursday, July 22, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Ronny Jackson, months after every single Democrat said they were vaxxed House Democrats made a simple, logical
7/22/2021
1 : 14
What A Day: Slimmed Jims
Maybe they'll vote her out with a curtsy? Wednesday, July 21, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Marjorie Taylor Greene, taking the Poster's Pledge House Republicans have radicalized
7/21/2021
0 : 34
What A Day: Worst man in space
Tom Brady, welcome to the resistance. Tuesday, July 20, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Jeff Bezos thanking the Amazon Community for his phallic joyride to the edge of space If you're a
7/20/2021
1 : 14
What A Day: Bill Cassidy and the Unvaxxed Kids
A two-for-one alternate reality subscription package! Monday, July 19, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Donald Trump, on a hypothetical zombie ticket of George Washington and Abraham Lincoln
7/16/2021
21 : 34
What A Day: Back that AZ up
(Somberly) Hell yeah. Friday, July 16, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS, BRIAN BEUTLER, & CROOKED MEDIA -Ivanka Trump on January 6, if you're in a credulous mood As reluctant as Sens. Sinemanchema (D-
7/16/2021
9 : 14
What A Day: Extending the Olivia branch
Sour to the people. Wednesday, July 14, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Anthony Fauci, on White House Vaccine Influencer Olivia Rodrigo Top Senate Democrats have reached an initial agreement
7/16/2021
9 : 7
What A Day: Out-of-Joint Chiefs
Let the Big Man on Bench enjoy his senior year! Thursday, July 15, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Donald Trump, garbage-star-maker and poet The nation's highest-ranking military officer
7/14/2021
0 : 54
What A Day: Exception improves the rule
Get in the carveout, loser, we're going legislating. Tuesday, July 13, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Terry McAuliffe baiting Donald Trump into the Virginia gubernatorial race Democrats
7/13/2021
0 : 4
What A Day: Don't suppress with Texas
The Kraken is...crying? Monday, July 12, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Donald Trump, on the growth he's experienced through two impeachments Dozens of Democratic state lawmakers have
7/10/2021
6 : 2
What A Day: Whoever Delt it, dealt it
Eat our unequally distributed dust, Gilded Age. Wednesday, July 7, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Donald Trump immediately grifting off of his frivolous social media lawsuit Between the
7/10/2021
6 : 1
What A Day: Debt fraught American summer
Fingers crossed for a light jog? Thursday, July 8, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Juvenile, vaccination outreach czar Senate Democrats are gearing up for an infrastructure sprint in the
7/10/2021
6 : 0
What A Day: A flail of two cities
Harnessing our nation's cringiest resource for good. Friday, July 9, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS, BRIAN BEUTLER, & CROOKED MEDIA -Stephen Miller, on taking office during a bungled pandemic In one
7/7/2021
0 : 44
What A Day: Down the Babbitt hole
Just the ocean inferno forecast, no funny business. Tuesday, July 6, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Kristi Noem, under a photo taken in Obama's America It has somehow been six months
7/2/2021
21 : 34
What A Day: Can't GETTR no satisfaction
Marijuana, or, "the cheetah's herb." Friday, July 2, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS, BRIAN BEUTLER, & CROOKED MEDIA -JD Vance, at the very moment his campaign sign made a run for it Heads up!
7/2/2021
0 : 44
What A Day: Alito shop of horrors
Somebody flunked out of tax evasion school. Thursday, July 1, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Adam Kinziger, on Kevin McCarthy's threat to punish Jan. 6 panel members Between two Supreme
7/1/2021
1 : 4
What A Day: Bleakness in Seattle
The tip of the disappearing iceberg. Wednesday, June 30, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Jon Tester on Lisa Murkowski, and also his wife President Biden's climate proposals have taken on
6/30/2021
0 : 54
What A Day: What Gosaround, comes around
Just a couch that's trying its best. Tuesday, June 29, 2021 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Wisconsin state Sen. Chris Kapenga, adoring reply guy While House Republicans contemplate how best