The world’s largest tech trade show, CES, opens to the public today to show off weird, wacky, and occasionally pretty useful new devices. More than 3,000 exhibitors and 100,000 attendees are expected to be in Las Vegas this week for the event as it tries to bounce back to its pre-pandemic popularity.

Before those 100,000 folks chug a yardstick drink on the Strip, here’s some of the tech they can check out at the show.

Not the birdhouse you made with your mom: Smart bird feeder Bird Buddy uses a camera and AI to identify the species of birds that perch on it. The company’s co-founder compared it to Pokémon GO…but birds.

Anti-snore pillow: 10Minds unveiled a pillow that detects snoring and then deploys little airbags to turn the sleeper’s head until it’s positioned so they no longer snore. It’s also, of course, hooked up to a smartphone app for on-screen snore analysis.

Self-driving stroller: Glüxkind’s “Ella” smart stroller is perfect for the boss baby on the way to the office. It has sensors that identify when there is a baby in the carriage and requires someone to be guiding it at those times. But the high-tech pram can self-brake, use “driver assist” to lighten the push, and drive around baby-less as needed (frankly, a terrifying thought).

The Gran Turismo movie: Sony got CES mixed up with Sundance and is using its stage to tease a movie based on its popular car-driving PlayStation game. It’s a sign the tech giant is heavily focusing on entertainment this year—it’s working on ten movies inspired by video games.

Pee analysis: The U-Scan from Withings is meant to be inserted into the toilet, and then users with good aim can pee on it. It collects and analyzes a small sample of urine to monitor menstruation, vitamin C levels, ketones, and other health indicators.

And there’s more: Morning Brew’s reporters at CES say to watch out for new tech related to the metaverse, agriculture, and healthcare. Keep up with their coverage here.—JW

Congress is still in chaos. The 118th Congress remains speaker-less after a second day in which GOP Rep. Kevin McCarthy failed to scrounge up enough votes from his colleagues to lead the closely divided House. Three more votes were held yesterday, but McCarthy didn’t manage to reach the 218 vote threshold he needs due to right-wing members of his own party voting against him (there have been six rounds of votes so far). The House will keep voting until a speaker is selected, and until then it can’t really do anything else—especially since no new representatives can be sworn in until there’s a speaker to do it. Republican lawmakers will have to make deals within the party, and potentially outside it, to end the standoff.

Meta’s expensive cookies. EU regulators fined Meta $414 million yesterday after ruling that the company illegally required Facebook, Instagram, and WhatsApp users there to opt in to personalized ads. The company put these permissions in its terms of service agreement, meaning that if you wanted to use any of its platforms, you had to fork over personal data—which runs afoul of European privacy law. To appease the EU, Meta must now change how it sets up its ads there, which could jeopardize 5–7% of Meta’s ad revenue.

🏖 Europe kicks off 2023 with a historic heat wave. At least eight European countries have logged their hottest January temperatures on record amid a heat wave encompassing about 15 countries across the Continent. The summerlike temps are causing ski resorts in the northern Alps and French Pyrenees to close. Meteorologists are raising the alarm, calling the weather “truly unprecedented in modern records.” The historically hot winter follows a historically hot summer, as 2022 marked Europe’s warmest ever.

Big news for dads who’ve been rocking the same HP laptop since Obama’s first term: Microsoft is working on a new version of its Bing search engine that will integrate OpenAI’s ChatGPT.

It’s an effort by Microsoft to lure users away from the search industry’s top dog, Google, by making answers to search queries more pertinent and, well, chatty. Who needs links to researched articles when you can simply generate a free-verse poem about the best desk chairs of 2023?

And Google is taking the AI threat seriously. Despite ChatGPT’s flaws (including noted racial biases and a tendency to provide wrong answers confidently), Google’s leadership declared its release a “code red” that could upend their business.

ChatGPT’s reply style also spells trouble for Google, as the company relies heavily on paid search results, which aren’t as easily integrated into direct, conversational answers. (Digital ads accounted for more than 80% of the company’s revenue in 2021.)

Zoom out: Microsoft has already invested $1 billion into OpenAI and has hopes that becoming a bigger player in search could help offset its problems elsewhere, like its slowing growth in cloud computing. Bing’s ChatGPT integration could launch as soon as late March, according to a report by The Information.—MK

Every high school English teacher’s favorite movie is at the center of a $500+ million California sexual abuse lawsuit. Olivia Hussey and Leonard Whiting sued Paramount last week, accusing the studio of sexually exploiting them while filming the 1968 movie Romeo and Juliet.

The claims: Hussey was 15 when she played Juliet and Whiting was 16 when he played Romeo. The pair allege that they were coerced into filming a nude bedroom scene by the film’s now-deceased director, Franco Zeffirelli, who initially promised that the two would wear flesh-colored undergarments for the scene.

He also allegedly told the actors that the cameras wouldn’t actually capture any nudity for the final film, which as you might remember from class…is not the case.

Why now? The underage nudity in the film caused pushback when it was first released over five decades ago. But the new lawsuit was brought because of a California law that temporarily suspended the statute of limitation on cases involving child sex abuse—meaning that from 2020 to 2022, survivors could bring claims from decades ago. And it’s not the only lawsuit dredging up old allegations: Several states including Arkansas, New Jersey, and New York have passed “revival statute” laws.—MM

Stat: Denmark had zero bank robberies last year. This was a first, but the number of bank holdups in the Nordic nation has been declining steadily over the last 20 years (there was only one there in 2021, while the US reported 1,724). It’s not necessarily because people who consume lots of herring are just better than the rest of us—Denmark’s banks have beefed up video surveillance and, as Danish society has become increasingly cashless, most branches don’t have sacks of bills on hand to steal.

Quote: “This factor allowed the enemy to track and determine the coordinates of the soldiers’ location for a missile strike.”

Russia is blaming its own soldiers’ unauthorized use of cell phones for a Ukrainian attack on New Year’s Day that killed at least 89 troopers. But others, including Britain’s Defense Ministry, have asserted that casualties were likely high because the school building in Eastern Ukraine that housed the soldiers was also used to store ammunition. Russia’s efforts to pin the blame on the victims has not quieted domestic critics of its handling of the Ukraine invasion.

Read: Why so much stuff is poorly made now. (Vox)

A way, wayback machine: See what your neighborhood looked like when dinosaurs lived there with this interactive map of ancient Earth.

Did you really LOL? This device knows.

New year, new conquest: It’s time for your brand to finally beat the dreaded “post-holiday sales slump.” Amp up your sales strategy with tips from Retail Brew’s latest guide.

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Whatever your situation, TaxAct helps make filing your taxes simple and easy. But that doesn’t mean it’ll be easy to spot which headline is fake in this tax-focused food edition of Three Headlines and a Lie.

1. Cutting that bagel will cost you: New York imposes 8 cent tax for all ‘altered’ bagels
2. Fresh fruit goes free: California to tax fruit only when sold in vending machines
3. Yes, chef: Chicago cook gets tax break for personal groceries, citing ‘professional development’
4. Hot and pricey: Michigan orders a tax on prepared foods sold in a heated state and/or with utensils

Annual planning has never been easier than with Money with Katie’s 2023 wealth planner. Track your income, spending, investing, and more in one easy-to-use tool. Shop here.

On Imposters, Morning Brew co-founder Alex Lieberman sits down with industry leaders, elite athletes, and entertainment’s biggest names to discuss the mental challenges they’ve overcome to get to where they are today. Listen here.

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