3 strategies to keep your top talent on the team

Gary Chapman's classic book, "The 5 Love Languages," can guide leaders to make real connections with their teams by learning what makes them feel appreciated -- anything from praising them in front of the boss to reducing their workload when they're busy. "Love languages are not a complete model of connection, nor are they perfect, but they do give us a doorway into understanding how to meet each other's interpersonal needs better," says Aaron Steinberg, co-founder of Grow Together.

Put it into practice: Leaders have used the "love language" concepts to improve communication and engagement, change team dynamics and resolve conflicts, says Ergi Gumusaneli, the CEO of Fitz Ilias Mental Health Providers. Love languages do differ, which means showing up for others in ways that may not appeal to you but make them feel appreciated.

Improve the chances of your top talent sticking around by creating a sense of belonging, encouraging them to think outside the box and leveraging AI in training to help them improve communication skills, writes Juan Betancourt, the CEO of Humantelligence. "Meeting each employee where they are will go a long way toward fostering the trust and belonging you need to execute your vision for the team," Betancourt notes.

Put it into practice: Discover how your team works by using a brainstorming session where everyone wears different "hats" -- someone suggests ideas while another may critique them -- to avoid the potential for "group think," Betancourt writes. "In time, you can also help your employees expand their abilities by asking them to tackle different work style roles so they can expand their repertoire of abilities."

Avoid creating a stressful, false sense of urgency for your team by encouraging them to talk about workload concerns, set realistic deadlines and emphasize a healthy balance between work and free time, writes Lolly Daskal. "By recognizing and extinguishing false urgency, leaders can cultivate a workplace where teams channel their focus toward meaningful tasks, thrive in their roles, and attain enduring success," Daskal notes.

Put it into practice: Leaders should model the team behaviors they want to see, such as open communication and effective delegation, to avoid false urgency, Daskal writes. "Demonstrating a poised and composed approach to work can serve as inspiration for team members."

Nearly 50 years after releasing her Grammy-winning song, "I Will Survive," Gloria Gaynor is back with an upcoming film and new music as her 80th birthday approaches, and the performer says the song has been her mantra, helping her to not define herself by bad experiences. "It's just a wonderful tool to keep me in check and to keep me grounded and remind me who I am: that I am truly a survivor and that can continue throughout my life," says Gaynor.

Just in time for Valentine's Day, a couple renovating their Minnesota home found a couple of old love letters behind a wall in their bathroom, signed by John B. and addressed to two girls. The couple has narrowed the author down to two suspects -- either the son of a man whose family lived in the home from the 1920s into the 1960s or an adult named John Book who lived in the house in the 1960s and even left some of his homework behind.

On Valentine's Day, reflecting on how we show appreciation to our team members is good. The five love languages are a great place to start because what makes me feel appreciated may make another feel slighted or even angry.

Back in the mid-1990s, when I worked for CNN, each year, we'd get a little catalog from which we could choose gifts as a sign of appreciation from the company. We didn't receive a catalog one year, but an email telling us to stop by a designated kiosk to receive the annual gift. It was an ... umbrella.

Needless to say, this gift made nearly everyone angry. In years past, we felt we at least had some choice in the matter, but this year, not only was a gift selected for us, but it was also, well, underwhelming.

Gifts are last on my list of love languages, with words of appreciation and physical touch taking the top two spots. I honestly would have appreciated some kind, uplifting words from my boss over an umbrella, but no one took the time to find that out.

It can be tricky to please everyone in a big company like CNN, but if you're leading a smaller organization, I recommend taking the time to find out what form of appreciation is appreciated by your team members. Maybe some of them would be thrilled with a company-branded umbrella. Others, though, may need your verbal recognition that they're doing a great job.

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