👋 Hey, it’s Wes. Welcome to my weekly newsletter on managing up, career growth, and standing out as a high-performer.

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I find intellectual honesty to be one of the most attractive traits in colleagues. In fact, if someone isn’t intellectually honest, I find it very difficult to work with them.

They can squirm out of anything.

They will make other people wrong.

They will do mental gymnastics to explain why they’re justified in doing whatever they want to do.

This is the kind of person who, no matter how compelling your argument is, refuses to say, “Good point.” No amount of reasoning will get through to them, because the whole point is they don’t want to be reasoned with.

This is frustrating to deal with, but I believe it ultimately hurts them more than it hurts you.

This is because intellectual honesty is the foundation for pretty much all professional and personal growth. If you want to improve at your craft, if you want to become a stronger and wiser operator…

It starts with being intellectually honest.

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What is intellectual honesty?

Intellectual honesty is seeking the truth and aiming to be accurate in your thinking and communication. It means having an evidence-based approach where you consider relevant information even if it contradicts your beliefs.

Intellectual honesty takes a willingness to see and admit the truth, even if it goes against your argument, supports the argument of “the other side,” or proves you wrong. Even if it bruises your ego. 

If this feels negative, intellectual honesty is actually positive. If you’re committed to seeing the truth, then every opportunity to be intellectually honest means cutting through BS, seeing objectively, and sharpening your own discernment.

Did you misread a situation? Could you have done things differently?

Excellent, now you can learn from it—and make better mistakes going forward.

You don’t only pay attention to what supports your argument. You don’t only blame others and absolve yourself of responsibility. You are objective about your contributions, both positive and negative, for the situations you’re in.

This might be the nerd in me, but that sounds pretty awesome.

On the other hand, folks who are not intellectually honest are busy creating bad logic to protect their psyche. 

They’re so busy insisting they are beyond reproach that they don’t reflect or learn. In the end, the only person who loses is themselves.

Protecting your psyche

Let’s be honest. Many of us have had a thought like this cross our minds:

“So-and-so is more successful than me, but at least I’m not [insert negative assumption about the other person].”

The point isn’t that your colleague, or friend, or whoever you’re comparing yourself to, has weaknesses or problems in their life.

The point is: Seeing someone similar but more successful triggered feelings of inadequacy for you.

Notice the difference:

🚫 “That person is successful. They must have terrible personal relationships and no social life outside of work.”

✅ “That person is successful. I have no idea what their life outside of work is like, nor is it any of my business, especially if my curiosity is driven by my wanting to feel superior in some way. I am grateful for my own personal relationships and social life.”

One is making unsubstantiated assertions about the other person based on zero data. One is commenting on your own gratitude and situation. 

Maybe you say, “But Wes, I know the person—and they really have nothing else in their life besides work.”

Fine. But if you’re feeling schadenfreude, the intellectually honest thing to do is to say, “I admit I’m a little happy about their struggles because it makes me feel better about myself.”

I’m not saying you have to be a saint.

It’s normal to feel inadequate or jealous of others sometimes. We all have ups and downs. The intellectually honest thing to do is to admit that to yourself.

What’s not intellectually honest? Inventing reasons why that person must be worse than you in some capacity to soothe your own ego.

“It’s not possible” vs “I wasn’t able to do it” vs “I don’t want to do it.” 

I had a colleague who thought it was impossible to be both direct and respectful.

They thought that honesty necessitated saying things that would hurt people. And that people who felt hurt were “too soft.” This was mind-boggling to me because this person was intelligent, discerning, and logical in many other ways.

They said, “Well, you can’t expect me to spend 3 hours messaging what to say to someone. That’s not sustainable.”

No one was asking for that. We’re talking about taking 10 minutes to increase the chances of getting the outcome they were aiming for.

No matter how many examples I shared of being direct without being a jerk, they couldn’t be convinced.

Then one day, they finally admitted:

“I don’t want to put the effort into choosing my words because I’m philosophically against needing to do that, and I don’t believe I should have to.”

Ah, there we go. We had gotten to the root of it.

They didn’t believe they should have to think about the impact of their words, and therefore, their brain made up all kinds of excuses not to do it.

There’s a difference between “it’s not possible” vs “I wasn’t able to do it” vs “I don’t want to do it.”

There are many different leadership styles, worldviews, and ways to be successful. I might not agree with your philosophy—but I will respect you for being intellectually honest about it.

How to tell if you’re being intellectually honest

So how do you know if you’re being intellectually honest?

I believe it takes self-awareness and a desire to be truthful. If being intellectually honest matters to you, you’ll try to act in accordance with your values.

Beyond that, try to challenge your own thinking. In the example above, you might consider: “Have I ever seen someone be direct without being a jerk?”

If the answer is yes, you’ve proven to yourself it is possible. It might be hard, and you might not want to do it, but it is possible. Because you were intellectually honest, you would realize the difference between “it’s not possible” versus “it’s hard for me and I haven’t decided if I want to put in the effort yet.”

This is a form of rigorous thinking in action. 

I have conversations in my own head all the time. I basically try to stress test my own beliefs to get more clarity and figure out what I think.

You can do this too. 

Ask yourself:

• Is this true?

• What evidence do I have for and against this?

• Am I telling myself a certain narrative to avoid facing a truth I don’t like?

• How might I recognize the truth in a neutral, objective way?

No one knows your unique situation as deeply as you do. If you want to insist there’s no way to do X, most people outside your team (or outside your head) probably won’t have enough context to truly debate you on this.

Choosing to be intellectually honest means saying, “I don’t want to delude myself or others. I want to figure out the truth because it makes me a sharper thinker and wiser leader.”

How important is intellectual honesty for you? Where do you see it showing up in your work or life? Hit reply because I’d love to hear from you.

Thanks for being here, and I’ll see you next Wednesday at 8am ET.

Wes

PS Here are more ways to connect:

1. Follow me on Twitter or LinkedIn for insights during the week (free).

2. Work with me for 1:1 executive coaching.

3. Practice how to manage up, present to your CEO, get buy-in from colleagues, etc in my 2-day intensive course with live workshops, Q&A, and hands-on exercises. Class starts in December. Save your spot here: Executive Communication & Influence for Senior ICs and Managers