Hello everyone, how are we holding up? How are we coping?

I’ve been…well, let’s say, not exactly thriving? Physically! Mentally! Emotionally! Actually, scratch that—I’m (thankfully) not completely unwell, but I’ve certainly felt better. For…various reasons.

Between a lingering cough, the ever-nearing election (I hope you’ve got a plan to vote!), news of the horrible T**** rally, and the absolute whirlwind that is the Q4 workload—all on top of the usual parenting hustle that cranks up a notch from mid-October onwards thanks to the pressure to create a “Fun and Festive Environment”—I’m hanging on by a thread.

I’m guessing I’m not alone in feeling this general overwhelm.

Now, I’m not saying we should bury our heads in the sands of self-care, ostrich-style. Staying informed, voting, and engaging in civic life are essential. But at some point, we all need to put on our oxygen masks, slow down for a moment, and fit in whatever acts of self-care we can muster, however simple or small. It’s the only way to keep going, to sustain the pace.

So! I wanted to dedicate today’s issue to a few easy (and some silly) ways to treat yourself during these particularly anxious times. A little lighthearted break for your inbox.

But first, I’d love to hear from you in the comments…

What’s in your emergency self-care kit? How are you making space for *you* this week? Tiny things count. In fact, they probably count the most.

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Before we dive in, a few seasonal treats. After all, fluffy sweaters and fall staples can be their own form of self-care.

To no one’s surprise, J.Crew has so much good stuff right now, including some great knits that will be staples in your fall/winter wardrobe. Everything is 30% off sitewide until October 31st (plus an extra 15% off if you’re a Passport member), so I thought I’d share some favorites…

And here’s what I picked up: a brushed cashmere knit (*all* their brushed cashmere stuff is so soft—like a kitten), olive green cotton pants that I’ve worn almost every day since I got them (on super sale right now for like…$40), and this brown crossbody bag that looks way more expensive than it is.

I also just ordered this mockneck sweater with the neatest little whipstitch detailing to wear with this satin mini-skirt and the sweetest little bow heels for date nights. The shape of this purse in the perfect autumn color caught my eye, too — so good for events, day dates, or going out.

Three more staples: Their tissue turtleneck has been a staple of mine for many years, and they make it in some really good colors now. It’s great as a base layer to wear with jeans, or you could dress it up with a skirt and tights. This relaxed v-neck cashmere sweater is perfect for throwing on with jeans and a belt. And if you’re in the market for a scarf so soft that it could honestly double as a comfort item, look no further.

*Sponsored mention. Thank you for supporting the brands that help keep Downtime going!

Here’s the trick:

Start your week with a little magic…

If the Sunday Scaries are creeping in, here’s a trick to brighten up even the most manic of Mondays. It comes from Ingrid Nilsen, founder of candle brand The New Savant¹, who shared a clever strategy on her Instagram Stories that I immediately loved: plan ahead something fun for Monday night. A simple treat-yourself moment—scheduled into the most blah day of the week.

With a packed work week (hello, Q4!), Ingrid planned her own self-care ritual in advance, choosing Monday nights for these mini breaks.

“Having something fun and easy, completely separate from work or chores, gives me something to look forward to!” she shared. “It’s also helping me finally check off things I’ve been wanting to do but always told myself I didn’t have time for.”

Would you try this plan-ahead approach?

And here are the treats:

10 tiny pick-me-up strategies I’ve used recently

That I invite you to try, too:

1. Listening to silly, just-for-fun podcasts.
   The more unhinged, the better. Last week, it was this episode of Normal Gossip detailing one disastrous day at work. This week, I’m all about this chat with Dolly Alderton on the Perfect Day podcast, where she and the host dive into her idea of the perfect day (it starts with zero meetings and zero emails and devolves into long pub nights and sea shanties in the best way). Please drop more silly podcast recs in the comments!

2. Keeping a lighthearted nonfiction book on hand.
   I love having something I can pick up at anytime for a quick laugh or awe-inspiring fact. It’s got to be short form nonfiction so I can drop in and out of the book with ease. Right now, I’m hooked on Vanishing Treasures, a tiny gem of a book by Katherine Rundell with mini essays about endangered animals. It’s packed with info you’ll want to share immediately with unsuspecting friends. (Fun fact: beavers’, erm, balls were once prized and hunted as an aphrodisiac. Truly shocking.) Any other recs along this same line? Note: The book is out on November 12th.

3. Scheduling a mid-afternoon treat.
   Can I be honest? This is usually just a latte and a pastry, or some seasonal drink from Starbucks (pumpkin chai latte for me). But sometimes it’s just driving to the local garden center and just…looking at things. Not even buying anything. Just looking! Nature is healing. And that counts as a treat.

4. Getting a dose of Vitamin D.

   On a recent walk with Lily, I realized she’s living her best life outside. I’m taking notes and taking a quick walk around the block whenever I need a little boost. Bonus points if I do it with no podcast, music, or audiobook in my ears.☀️

5. Rearranging things at home.

   Maybe it’s just a nervous tic, but moving things around does wonders for my space—and my mood. Yesterday, I “rearranged” this little section of our coffee bar hutch area. It used to look sad with just the painting and the lamp. Now, it looks somewhat styled, and I get a little mood boost every time I look at it. Puttering as self-care ✔️

6. Buying cheap flowers and arranging them!

   I grabbed these for $3.99 at Trader Joe’s yesterday. The arranging part is the best—and the most critical. An intentional, hands-on activity that lets me take a break from screens, step back at the end, and admire the result of my handiwork.

7. Creating a cozy solo movie or TV show night, paired with a treat.

   Right now, it’s My Lady Jane (I’m trying it again after giving up on it earlier this year). Next up, it’ll be Practical Magic. Post-election, you bet I am firing up all the terrible holiday movies (Hot Frosty is on my list). And I *will* be sipping hot apple cider during both. (Thank you, Ingrid, for the cozy move night inspiration!)

8. Texting my long-distance besties funny and mundane updates.

   Sometimes it’s a silly product link, sometimes a random thought, sometimes a screenshot of a PR email I received about a…pubic hair styling kit (don’t ask). I love sharing low-pressure updates with my friends and hopefully give them a nice laugh during their days.

9. Trying a fun new beauty ritual.

   Lately, it’s this K-Beauty mask my sister swears by. You mix it up like goop, it dries into a rubbery sheet, and peeling it off is a deeply, *deeply* satisfying experience. It’s the most hydrated my skin has felt after using any product. You will look like a monster during, and like a babe after.

10. Flipping through cookbooks for cozy inspiration.

    Tomorrow, I’m trying Caroline Chambers’ “Cheater Chicken Tinga Tostadas” from her cookbook—going the slow cooker route because it feels cozier. There’s something delightful about flipping through a physical cookbook and cooking from it!

Extra treat ideas and miscellany…

• Wearing an outfit on repeat. As in, multiple times during a week. Is this gross? Having a go-to outfit formula for the whole week has lifted my mental load this week. For me, wearing the pants you bought for $40 during a J.Crew sale because they are so damn comfortable + a sweater has been the best.

• Letting yourself dive into the book you’re *most* excited about from your TBR pile. And setting aside the one you’re currently slogging through. No rules, just pure anticipation.

• Taking yourself on an artist’s date. This idea is from Julia Cameron’s book, The Artist’s Way. The idea is simple: schedule a solo outing that fuels your creativity and gives you space to reconnect with yourself. For me, this is typically a trip to the bookstore, but I’d love to expand this into trips into the wonderful museums in our city. (If there are any Shakespeare fans out there…can we plan a Downtime trip out to the Folger?!)

• Planning a semi-elaborate baking project. God, is there anything better than knowing you’ll bake something delicious and warming tonight? You might have all the ingredients already for these pumpkin oatmeal cookies. (*NYT gift link) Be sure to check the Downtime archives for other recipe ideas, too.

Snacking Bakes for the Holiday Season

Aliza Abarbanel · December 5, 2023

Editorial note: Alisha is on maternity leave. In the meantime, Downtime is edited by Aliza Abarbanel.

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That’s it from me! I’d love to hear your favorite pick-me-up ideas in the comments. Tell me—what’s keeping your spirits up right now? —Alisha

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