(Part 2/3) How I decided to make a life change

Reader,

In yesterday’s email, I was telling the story about trying to decide whether I should move to San Francisco even though it wasn’t the “right” financial decision. 

THOUSANDS of you told me how you’d handle it. 

You might be surprised by what I decided. 

And in this email, I’ll share a “psychological framework” that you can use to make big decisions in your own life. 

Ok, technically I should have stayed in my Palo Alto–area apartment because I had an awesome deal and I was saving tons of money every month. But I wanted to move to SF (even though my expenses would DOUBLE) so I could hang out with friends and meet new people. 

I had some money in savings, so it wouldn’t be an immediate hit … but from a strictly financial analysis, I should have stayed where I was. 

And yet … I DID IT. I moved to SF. 

I did the analysis … then totally ignored it and went with my gut. I packed my bags and moved into a new SF apartment weeks later. 

Guys, sometimes you have to make decisions NOT on the financial analysis, but on what intuitively feels right. This is why the “debt snowball” works, even though it’s not the mathematically correct way to pay off debt. A lot of engineers and economists reading this are sputtering right now, saying, “Bu … but Ramit … what about the NUMBERS???” These people find more comfort in Excel models than in the reality of how humans actually behave. 

My decision to move wasn’t just a random decision. This is a pattern I’ve seen among my Top Performer friends over and over: They make decisions that seem ultra-risky to outsiders … but what those people don’t see is the way Top Performers think about risk. 

Key MISTAKES people make when thinking about risk:

• Most people think all risk = bad. If I quit my job, I’ll be out on the street! If I invest in the market, I’ll lose all my money! If I try to start something new, I’ll fail … and then it’s all over for me! Waa (cue sad Hans Zimmer orchestral music)
• And so many people live a life of fear insidiously bubbling under the surface … never powerful enough to cause them to change, but just deep enough to get them to stay where they are, paddling in the same place for life

Key POSITIVE psychological frameworks that Top Performers use:

• If you use the Tripod of Stability, you can keep the major things in your life stable … so you can afford to be ultra-risky on a few core things
• Top Performers are confident enough in their own abilities that they can jump “feet-first” into situations, counting on their own skills to help figure it out
• Does this always work? No. But even if the worst happens … how bad is it really? In my case, I would have just packed up and moved back down if I couldn’t afford it

I call these psychological frameworks “Success Triggers,” and I want to share more of them with you. 

Think about it. The idea of carefully weighing your risks/potential rewards … and knowing when to step out on the ledge and take a risk … that is an incredibly powerful Success Trigger. 

When was the last time you let a risk hold you back and waited until you were “ready”? 

And when did you say, “Screw it — I’m going to try this and see what happens”? 

Which one gave you MORE? MORE options, MORE results, MORE freedom? 

That’s the power of employing a Success Trigger, or psychological framework, to guide you in the tough decisions you face. 

(By the way, guess what? A month after moving, I got a $20,000 raise. I NEVER expected it. I never planned for it. But when I moved to SF, I knew I would force myself to start thinking bigger.) 

Life coaches, aka unemployed people who give other people advice, would call this “manifesting success.” I don’t know about that, but I do know that Top Performers routinely step into situations they’re not “technically” equipped for … knowing that they trust themselves to find a way to succeed. 

Examples of applying this Success Trigger:

• Applying for a job where you don’t “technically” meet the requirements
• Emailing someone who’s “technically” way more important than you to meet for coffee
• Joining a course that’s slightly more advanced than you’re “technically” ready for … but busting your ass to ramp up quickly

So … this is just one Success Trigger. There are MANY more. How can you apply OTHER ones to your life? 

Pop quiz #2: You’re at a bar and this happens. What would you do?
Years ago, people would criticize me for having a site called “I Will Teach You To Be Rich.” Who are you to teach this? Why would anyone listen to you? Why are you an oblong-headed goon? Etc. 

I used to get really uncomfortable and have terrible responses to their accusations. Imagine someone questioning you for the very thing you spend 6+ hours a day on, for free. How would you take it? 

Over time, I learned how to handle critics, even highly antagonistic ones. Now, it’s fun. It’s like playing with a kitten by throwing a ball of yarn. It’s pure amusement and they have no chance of winning since I’ve seen so many critics just like them. I lead them unassumingly down the road towards their doom, only they have no idea where they’re going. 

I'll tell you one of my favorite examples of this. I was out at a bar and chatted up a friend of a friend. She was a psychiatrist, and when she asked what I did (that was her first question, ugh), she instantly crinkled her nose at my response. 

“What are your CREDENTIALS?” she hissed at me. 

I smiled. I knew this was coming. It always does when I meet a psychologist or psychiatrist. 

QUESTION FOR YOU: How would you respond? If you met someone at a bar and they condescendingly questioned your credentials, how would you react? 

Rules:

1. Your response has to be polite
2. No throwing drinks or breaking beer bottles over people’s heads
3. Don’t just blurt out a response. Think about what Success Trigger, or psychological framework, you would use in this scenario

Tell me what you would say — and WHY. Just reply to this email. I read every response.

I’ll tell you how I handled this in my next email.

P.S. The concept of Success Triggers is one you can use for the rest of your life — and I’m going to teach you my most powerful ones in the next email. But if you’d like a sneak peek, check out my Success Triggers course now.