Last week, I wrote about the six money lies told to (and about) women. They’re a mess. And they mess us up. To counter those lies and shift the focus back, this week I offer you seven truths about women and money:

1. It’s not your fault: “Other countries have social safety nets. The US has women.”

If this wasn’t clear before, the pandemic drove it home. The US has no mandated paid parental leave, no universal low-cost child care, no mandatory sick leave. As sociologist Jessica Calarco put it, mothers are our safety net.

No number of self-help books can help overcome this. It’s not a personal issue; it’s a structural one in a society that pays men more. Even before gender expectations around who does the caregiving enter the picture: If someone needs to quit to take care of the kids, it’s usually the one who’s earning less money for the family.

2. “Todd” is never going to promote you, and that’s not your fault, either.

Your boss may be a nice guy. Seems supportive in your meetings. He probably went to unconscious bias training two weeks ago. And maybe he drops by for a drink at the company’s women’s group. But no matter what he says, this is the truth: If despite your great work, he hasn’t promoted you in three years but has promoted Andrew and Josh and Karl and Chris, he’s never going to promote you.

The other five truths are just as critical to know.