[Electric Speed] Understanding conversation styles | Book discovery tool

A note from Jane

Do you act as a volunteer or as an interviewer in a conversation?

I only learned about this concept last week, in a fascinating article by McKinley Valentine, "How to Salvage Awkward Social Situations by Understanding Conversation Styles."

In my youth and early adult life, I was an interviewer, to a fault. I would ask people questions and, after getting a response, ask another question. And another.

It’s a wonderful way to never make friends. But I saw it as expressing genuine interest in other people. Plus it was dramatically easier than talking about myself, because as soon as you say something about yourself, there is risk. Maybe the other person will think you’re unintelligent or unsophisticated. Or what if they use the information against you? I was teased a lot as a child, and my No. 1 means of protection was keeping my mouth shut.

This video of Ira Glass partly broke the spell for me. During a talk on storytelling he says, "When somebody’s got a good personality, it’s like someone who is good in a conversation. They talk amusingly and interestingly about themselves for a while, and then they let the other person talk for a while because they’re interested in other people and they’re interested in the world."

The veil fell. Oh, that’s a good personality! It requires talking about yourself!

I’ve since become more forthcoming in conversations, but it still feels unnatural to volunteer information. I’ve always enjoyed how silence creates mystery and even more attention when you finally do speak.

However, I do like testing out story material and methods of revealing myself that are entertaining—a useful thing for a writer. Not talking about myself at all may create some intrigue, but it doesn’t lead to intimacy or connection.

Jane

Shepherd bills itself as "like browsing the best bookstore in the world." I think it very nearly lives up to that tagline. (The site is about to undergo a redesign, which is needed.)

You’ll find curated lists on the best books on England’s medieval queens, the best romance books for reading late at night, the quirkiest books about life after death, and so much more.

Authors are invited to contribute to the site by picking their five favorite books around a topic or theme they are passionate about.

My thanks to Jennifer Howard for the recommendation.

When it’s time to hire a professional editor, there are more options available than ever before, and it can be confusing to sift through all the variables: What’s the difference between a developmental edit and a line edit and a copyedit? How do you know what you need or when? What should an edit cost—and is it worth it?

This 90-minute workshop on Dec. 15, presented by career freelance editor Tiffany Yates Martin, will help you determine whether and when you need a professional edit; show you what to look for in a good editor; offer specific resources for finding the best in the business and your perfect fit; point out red flags to watch out for; and explain other options if hiring an editor isn’t in your budget right now.

In the last issue, I asked you to tell me your favorite free video editing software. Here’s what you said:

I’m not sure I would consider iMovie free, but I’ve been learning and using it more these days to create my post office videos. YouTube Creator is also good for basic edits. —David W. Gates Jr.
AVS4YOU starts out free for a month, then you can buy for $39 for a year or $59 for lifetime. That includes not just the video editing program, but all of their software. It’s super easy to use. It includes being able to mix tracks, which most audio editing softwares do not include (like Audacity). —Zorica
A few months ago I downloaded DaVinci Resolve. It does much more than I will ever need, and there is quite a learning curve to it. I have found YouTube has plenty of tutorials which have answered my questions so far. There is a paid version, but I don’t see needing that. —Gladys Strickland
For free video editing software, OpenShot is my pick. When the pandemic started, I took on the responsibility of assembling and editing the online worship videos for my wife’s church. I picked up OpenShot the first week and got right into it. It was easy to learn, does everything I need it to do, and does it pretty quickly. Twenty-one months later, it’s still handling all of my video creation. —Jacob Stutzman
Adobe Spark is a simple but free editing app. I also like Adobe Premiere Rush, but that does have a fee. Both are great for beginners to quickly learn how to use. For more complicated projects, DaVinci Resolve and Avid Media Composer offer free versions of their apps. —Daniel Marcou

Next question: Can you recommend a self-service publicity or PR platform? Examples: PodMatch, which I recommended last month, HARO (Help a Reporter Out), or JustReachOut. Hit reply to this email or discuss on Discord.

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