Old guy roulette — End of Staples — NBA Xmas deets

Friday, December 24th, 2021

  The Opening Tip

  • The Lakers closed out Staples Center in a very forgettable way
  • Spreads, missing stars, game times for this year’s Christmas slate
  • A D.C. teacher cashed a very important shot

1. The mad scramble to sign old guys is on

Omicron is raging through the NBA. More than a quarter of the league has spent time in health and safety protocols this season. 

Things have been better. 

But!

At least Joe Johnson is back in the league. The 40-year-old signed a 10-day deal with the Celtics on Wednesday, and, later that day, checked in in garbage time and cashed his first shot

  • Johnson is among a growing number of suddenly-active players called into action via the league’s ‘hardship exception,’ which allows teams to scramble-sign whoever they need while their list of quarantining players piles up. 
  • So far, Johnson, Lance Stephenson, C.J. Miles, Isaiah Thomas, Ersan Ilyasova, Brandon Knight and other characters of our millennial youth have been thrust into real, actual NBA action. 

Two things:

  1. We are very for this, but justice hasn’t fully been served until Jamal Crawford gets his 10-day deal. 
  2. Johnson, who debuted with the Celtics in 2001, is now the only active player from the 2001 draft, and the only active player to have played against Michael Jordan.  

[READ: Omicron brings unprecedented challenge for NBA bosses]

2. Daily GIFTransition offense at its finest

The Lakers closed out the Staples Center era last night (it will now be known as Crypto.com Arena) with a blowout loss to the Spurs, falling to 16-17.

  • The bigger non-effort included the smaller non-effort above, in which LeBron was matched up 1-on-5 with San Antonio because his other four teammates just didn’t have it in them. Here’s the entire play.

FYI: The Spurs also beat the Lakers in the final game of the Great Western Forum in 1999. They’re only 13-18 this year, but Dejounte Murray has morphed into a triple-double machine.

3. Trivia time

With Oracle Arena now out of commission, what’s the oldest active NBA stadium?

Answer at the bottom.

4. Your star-devoid NBA Christmas preview

Hawks at Knicks, noon ET, ESPN

Stars update: Trae Young has been in health and safety protocols since Dec. 19. It’s unclear if he’ll play. The Knicks, who don’t have any stars, aren’t missing any.

Current spread: Knicks -6.5

Also: This is the first Hawks game in New York since their playoff series last year. It would be much better theater if Young is available.


Celtics at Bucks, 2:30 ET, ABC

Stars update: Giannis’ 10-day quarantine is up today. He's currently undecided on playing tomorrow.

Current spread: Bucks -4.5

Also: Jrue Holiday is averaging 28.5 PPG in his last four games.


Warriors at Suns, 5 ET, ABC

Stars update: Chris Paul, Devin Booker, DeAndre Ayton, Steph Curry and Draymond Green are all good to go. This is the one untarnished matchup.

Current spread: Suns -6.5

Also: The Suns (26-5) and Warriors (26-6) have by far the two best records in the league. Next is Brooklyn at 21-9.


Nets at Lakers, 8 ET, ESPN/ABC

Stars update: Kevin Durant got out of H&S protocols today. It’s unclear if he’ll board a plane with no ramp up to play in a big game one day later. James Harden will play and so will LeBron James and Russell Westbrook, though Anthony Davis remains out with an ankle injury.

Current spread: Nets -1.5

Also: Durant, somehow, hasn’t played LeBron in an NBA game since Christmas day, 2018.


Mavericks at Jazz, 10:30 ET, ESPN

Stars update: No Luka Doncic for the Mavs, which makes this one, uh, challenging to sell.

Current spread: Jazz -12.5

Also: Unfortunately we must link you to this picture we found on the internet of Kristaps Porzingis.

[READ: How the Suns silenced the skeptics -- and became even more dangerous than last year]

5.  Quick Hits

  • Look at this pure halfcourt shot by a teacher in D.C., which netted her students hot chocolate  
  • Kemba Walker dropped 44 points last night in a loss to the Wizards
  • Steph Curry dropped 46 on 22 shots and eight made 3s last night
  • Jordan Clarkson poster alert
  • Europeans think the dino Raptors jerseys are the GOAT
  • ICYMI, the Nets granted Kyrie Irving part-time player status. He then immediately tested positive for COVID and entered health and safety protocols. 

6.  Reads

  • Lakers fans frustrated with volatile hot dog prices in Crypto.Com Arena [The Onion]
  • It’s 30 minutes before tip-off. Why is Tom Izzo already courtside? [The Athletic]
  • The NBA’s war on omicron Christmas: Behind closed doors with anti-swabber superstars [Rolling Stone]

Trivia answer: Madison Square Garden (1968)


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