Crooked Media - What A Day: A time to bill

Thursday, June 02, 2022

 -Bill Barr, clown-ass attorney general

The nation suffered another gruesome mass murder yesterday. It’s like Groundhog Day, except if you’re the shooter. Or one of the victims. It’s like Groundhog Day for Mitch McConnell.

Now what? Well, it seems that lawmakers have finally realized once again that we have a gun problem, which is a first step. Both the House and Senate have made public moves toward change. 

Perhaps we will get some clarification on where all of this is headed when President Biden addresses the country tonight. But the fight looks far from over, and we've been down the road of frameworks of bills that ultimately don't pass too many times before. 

Happy Pride month! This year, Crooked Media’s Pride fund is supporting three incredible organizations that provide community building, gender affirming, and life saving resources to the queer and transgender community. Visit to donate and learn more.

Texts from Mark Meadow’s phone previously given to the House January 6 Committee have been publicly released, and they include over 150 texts that Meadows made and received on the day of the Capitol riot. The texts offer further clarity as to which Trump allies were begging for the President to do something, and who wanted to help strategize about making the chaos work for them. Meadows turned over these messages voluntarily, but selectively, so one can assume there are even more damning texts in existence. In other January 6 committee evidence, Pennsylvania GOP gubernatorial nominee Doug Mastriano turned over materials this week, which provided previously unreported details of his hand in renting buses to take pro-Trump protesters to the Capitol, and has indicated he will testify under oath. 

Life can be overwhelming, and many people are burned out without even knowing it. Symptoms of burnout can include lack of  motivation, feeling helpless or trapped, detachment, fatigue, and more. 

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It’s much more affordable than in-person therapy and you can be  matched with a therapist in under 48 hours. 

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The Proud Boys showed up at a recent Miami-Dade Republican Party fundraising dinner and immediately got into an altercation at the valet station. But this time, unlike on January 6, they were actually invited. Various Proud Boy–affiliated extremists, taking their cue from guru/sentient acne Stephen Bannon, have been volunteering and running for local offices across the country—nowhere more successfully than Miami-Dade. Six current or former Proud Boys now sit on the Miami-Dade Republican Executive Committee, as they look to exert more control over local elections. For decades, Miami-Dade has been a Democratic stronghold, even as Jeb Bush and friends built a Republican presence around anti-Castro sentiment. Assuming they stay out of prison for their role in the insurrection, these Proud Boys look to be a radical, lasting, and dangerous new addition to Florida politics. Please clap.

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In a blow to the intervention industry, it appears that heavy drinkers are happier and healthier after 60. Drinking elevates your mood, reduces stress, and even keeps you slimmer. Don’t ask too many questions.

Sia gifted $100,000 to Survivor Castaway Drea Wheeler for her exciting gameplay, and it’s not the first time Sia’s done it. Finally, reality stardom pays off!

Spain introduced a bill that would require companies to have live customer-service representatives answer phone calls, and limit the time to reach a live person to a maximum of three minutes. No word yet on making all hold music the Encanto soundtrack.

The White House will finally begin paying its interns $750/wk. 

. . . . . .

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