Belladonnaoflavender - Dead Frogs
Hi, I will always appreciate you connecting with me through my virtual hugs. Hugs can be morbid, weird, and suffocating too. But most of the times, my words will never be just mine- I strive to share stories, poems, words that make a difference in all possible art forms- I am going to talk about the picture above- it is me as Leo as I can muster to be without looking like a lion. My hair is in disarray- it always is. No amount of conditioner or high-priced shampoo can make it better. I have been to the salon twice in my life and it did something for me to feel like I was ‘becoming’ but hey, don’t you think a messy head is so giving? Anything that does make my hair (jattas) better lasts only for a day and by the end of it, my hair is least of what a lion’s mare looks like- making me less of what I was not even full before. Do you get it? But who sleeps on silk pillows? Not me I thought. I don’t think my ancestors did. What they did not- I must if it is a necessity but what necessity does a knotted jatadhaari hair probe? Who can tell me? For the longest time, I have slept on floors and beds that can give spinal deformities and like half my India, I have gotten back problems- every time I read and crane my neck, I miss my flat floors and sweaty body trying to sleep as a child in Gandhinagar. I remember that having my own bed in law school hostels was not made for solving back problems at all. I remember massaging my own back and neck like my mother did when I missed her and when my injury was too immediate to even go to a doctor or seek help because nobody told us that the back and the spine are also important. Nobody told us that the mind is actually, nothing. That it can sustain itself if god will.
I have been inching toward that anonymity of an artist’s life that contributes towards her Art. What becomes Art, despite? A cord was wrapped around my throat, but the doctor had proclaimed the chord wouldn't have killed me. I was born with my fists out. Against. It was raining, is what my mother remembers. There were lots of smutty clouds in the sky, and yet the stars were visible when the contractions started. Mother was young. She is believed to have been dreaming because she was muttering throughout the bullock ride to the unnamed hospital. She was in enormous pain because I must have been in terrible pain when I had announced my birth. I was too pained to have uttered a sound. Or a shriek. Through a dramatic drop in the stillness of birth at a rustic hospital that had grunting and gurgling buffaloes swanking its entrances. I do not remember. Mother says I was playing with my aunt who dropped me from the third floor of a four-storey house in the evening heat of Gaya’s tranquil, days after my birth, exactly a year after, on my birthday. And I somewhat remember it every time I trip and fall. Every time I am up on heights. When I am nearer to the sky, away from the earth. It has been a while but you know how much I want you to be happy- I also know you have been struggling- so - To Make You Feel Good- Hope you are having better days and the heatwave is finally saying goodbye’s so I hope for nothing but the rain to wash our tears away and the seasons to make us feel like crying ain’t the only way we can feel alive-
This is a free newsletter but not cheap. If you love it, consider supporting it by liking and sharing this newsletter. This letter is reader-supported, hence the lack of ads and sponsors. I don’t get much feedback on my newsletters (I have approximately 2000 and counting readers) If you do read, please feel free to drop me a note or hit the “heart” on the newsletter- |
Older messages
Capitalism is hard, be soft
Monday, May 9, 2022
I am done whining, are you?
First Letter of the Year 2022
Monday, January 17, 2022
Lists
Girl interrupted
Sunday, December 19, 2021
Girl interrupted Belladonnaoflavender Dec 19 Comment Share Not to feel exasperated or defeated or despondent because your days aren't packed with wise and moral actions. But to get back up when you
“Oh Death, Where is the Antidote to Thy Sting”
Thursday, October 28, 2021
Masterchef, travel tonnes & links as always
Jerk of All Trades
Saturday, October 2, 2021
Jack of all trades & 20+ Links Lists
You Might Also Like
My Top 3: Little Things I'm Proud Of
Friday, May 3, 2024
*preens* ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏
How to Hide Your Phone Number on Android and iPhone
Thursday, May 2, 2024
Use the 80/20 Rule to Purge Stuff You Don't Need. With these three methods, you can place phone calls anonymously. Not displaying correctly? View this newsletter online. TODAY'S FEATURED STORY
Britney Spears' "Lip Gloss" Manicure Sparkles With Bedazzled Accents
Thursday, May 2, 2024
Plus, Rihanna's glowy foundation trick, Bella Hadid's new perfume is here, & more.
The Mom Who Got Ovarian Cancer After Having Her Ovaries Removed
Thursday, May 2, 2024
What's new today on the Cut — covering style, self, culture, and power, plus interviews, profiles, columns, and commentary from our editors. Brand Logo THURSDAY, MAY 2 how i got this baby The Mom
Get Chiseled Abs!
Thursday, May 2, 2024
special offer from men's health Sculpt epic abs in 90 days! View in Browser Are you tough enough for this 90 day challenge? A seriously strong core requires getting serious about your plan of
What to do with extra sourdough starter
Thursday, May 2, 2024
How communities are keeping college campus protesters fed
GOP Senator accidentally creates amazing ad for climate activists
Thursday, May 2, 2024
Senator John Kennedy's profanity-laden rant at Wednesday's Senate hearing is now being used against him. ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏
Women Entrepreneurs: Fund Her Future Grant Applications Are Open NOW
Thursday, May 2, 2024
Presented By H&R Block.
This Is For Real
Thursday, May 2, 2024
Thoughts on the overall situation of the urbanism movement ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏
Meet Claude Dolbec: Montreal's Elusive Sign Painter
Thursday, May 2, 2024
Short documentary feature about Montreal's most prolific, but elusive sign painters: Claude Dolbec. BLAG Magazine: Adventures in Sign Painting Craft, Community & Culture bl.ag online weekly (