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A note from Jane

Back in March, there was a fascinating profile of philosopher/professor Agnes Callard in The New Yorker. The profile ends up partly a meditation on marriage and what we can reasonably expect from our partner. Callard strives for a much higher ideal than I do. For years, I’ve followed the Alain de Botton method: Lower your expectations. And then lower them again.

In a nutshell, Callard was content in her marriage, but met someone who upended her idea of what love and marriage can be. In other words, she fell in love with someone else. Common enough. It’s what happened next that’s remarkable.

Rather than hide what was going on, Callard immediately told her husband (also a philosopher) about her revelation. And they were able to have a rational conversation about it.

Whatever you think of Callard, I admire that she didn’t ignore or discount what was happening to her. She examined her feelings with curiosity and self-regard. And, the profile seems to imply, without guilt or shame.

You’ll have to read the article to learn what happens next—or Google around. It’s generated a lot of conversation, not much of it kind toward Callard. She herself admits to selfishness, but seemingly as a neutral matter and not something that can be fixed. I came away finding her a healthy, if complicated, human being.

Jane

​Bob Eckstein​

ISSUE SPONSOR

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Jane’s Electric Speed List

Here are some of the latest things I’ve discovered. (I am not paid to mention any of these resources; there are no affiliate links.)

Best thing I’ve read yet on generative AI, writing, and creativity

This article is by Stephen Marche, author of the AI-generated novel The Death of the Author. He offers a fascinating look at how he used various AI tools to achieve specific effects in his novel, and comments on the implications of the technology for writers.

“The traditional values of creative composition were entirely alive during my process. That should come as no surprise. The transition from painting to photography required a complete reevaluation of the nature of visual creativity, but the value of understanding form and color, of framing, of the ability to recognize the transience of emotion across a face or a landscape—the need to understand the materials of production and the power of your subjects—stayed. None of that is going away. None of it will ever go away.”

This is worth a read regardless of how you feel about generative AI. Read at The Atlantic.​

The American Prison Writing Archive

I have never taught writing to people who are incarcerated, although I’ve had conversations with writers who do. The stories I hear demonstrate the powerful difference it makes not just to the imprisoned, but also to the instructors and society at large. You can read prison writing at The American Prison Writing Archive, which exists in part due to a grant from the National Endowment for the Arts.

Do you still believe in the power and magic of the music album?

Then you’ll want to check out Album Whale. It’s a place to make and share lists of albums. Free. No ads. Just goodness.

In the not-digital department: Felt Right

Want to add a bit of color to your home or office? Or perhaps create an interesting pinboard wall? Check out Felt Right. My husband and I recently created and ordered a project using their “design your own” tool. The application was easy and the results excellent.

NEXT ONLINE CLASS

May 25: Nail Your Memoir Structure by Thinking Like a Novelist with Allison K Williams

Where should your memoir begin? How should it end? What’s an “inciting incident” or a “climax” when you’re looking at your life? In this class, you’ll learn how to structure a memoir to engage readers, agents and publishers. With examples from published work both literary and commercial, we’ll look at how dramatic structure works and what type will suit your memoir. Suitable for those with an idea, a draft, or a terrifying pile of raw material, you’ll discover how to tell the right story about the story you need to tell.

Your turn: Mother’s Day

In the last issue, I asked you to share preferred gifts or activities for Mother’s Day. Here’s what you said.

• What do I want for Mother’s Day? To hear from my children and to hug my grandson. Flowers would be nice too. —Nikki Finlay
• Since the children were babies, each Mother’s Day I opted for a hike in the woods followed by lunch at an outdoor hamburger joint (i.e., A&W). … The kids are grown and live in other states now with children of their own. Still, my husband and I continue the tradition. I always get a picture of myself with another hiking family’s kids, then send the photo to my grown-ups telling them I’ve adopted new kiddos since they had some nerve growing up! Hahaha! —Nancy Solak
• When my mother and I lived in the same area, I used to take her out for breakfast/brunch at a little place that had good omelets. That was a very long time ago and I’m guessing that now my brother may buy her irises as he does that at Christmas. —Karla Huebner
• I want time with all the kids. Gift wise: an album of photos of family throughout the year; an album of their favorite music; artwork by all ages, line drawings, fingerprint, any media at all; a written memory of a special time shared; a picnic with coconut cake. —GKF
• Paint together. We are a family of four and we divided the canvas into 4 sections, one for each person. It’s a wonderful experience having everyone work together. We didn’t give ourselves any restraints or theme, that way everyone was able to freely follow their creative impulses of the moment. You’ll end up with a beautiful piece of art filled with love. —Sünje O’Clancy
• The best day includes some time in the dirt gardening and a picnic with food I didn’t have to cook! —Sunjack
• I always love my daughter’s little sketches every Mother’s Day, but what I really appreciate is that she calls me several times a month just to check in or share news (we live several hours apart). —Joanne Orion Miller
• Here are some ways to support mothers who’ve lost a child, at any age, for any reason: Acknowledge her loss. It’s important to let her know that you are aware of her loss and that you care. A simple message like, “I’m thinking of you today, I know it’s not an easy day for you” can go a long way. Share memories: Encourage her to share memories of her child, and be willing to listen without judgment or interruption. Offer your own memories or stories of her child if you have them (my personal favorite!) —Barbara Legere

Next question: What’s your favorite road trip gear—or favorite tip or trick? Tell me about it! Hit reply to this message, or head on over to Discord to share.

Free resources featuring Jane

• May 28: The StoryWheel with Jule Kucera

Upcoming online classes

• ​Publishing Trends in 2023 with Jane Friedman, May 16
• ​Today’s Key Book Publishing Paths with Jane Friedman, May 18
• ​Nail Your Memoir Structure with Allison K Williams, May 25
• ​Memoir or Self-Help? with Liz Green, May 31
• ​Bring Your Story World to Life with Julie Artz, June 14
• ​Create an Author Website in 24 Hours or Less with Jane Friedman, June 22

Meet Jane at an event

• ​BLK INK Writer’s Workshop (online), May 18–20
• ​Muse & Marketplace Publishing Summit (online), May 20–21
• ​An Evening with Jane Friedman (Cincinnati), June 26
• ​Midwest Writers Workshop (Muncie, Ind.), July 19–22
• ​Into the Springs Writers Workshop (Ohio), Aug. 4–6
• ​Writing in the Ozarks (Eureka Springs, Ark.), Oct. 12–14

“At electric speed, all forms are pushed to the limits of their potential.”
—Marshall McLuhan

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