The Opening Tip

• Why can’t the 2017 Warriors drink beer? 
• A random Twitter account is out-scooping the scoopsters
• The Spurs legends took a personality pic

1. These people are just miserable

A year-and-a-half after requesting a trade from the Nets and ~two seasons after requesting a trade from the Rockets, James Harden has requested a trade from the 76ers.

ICYWW, here’s the updated trade request leaderboard over the last five years:

1. Harden, 3
2. Kevin Durant, 2
3. Kyrie Irving, 2 
4. All others, 1

With all the restlessness and unhappiness, you’d assume these three haven’t had any agency, freewill or autonomy to construct a basketball team exactly the way they want it, right? And these three superstar friends definitely never got the chance to all play on the same team, right??

But seriously: What is it with these three in particular, who’ve played for a combined nine teams (soon-to-be 10) since the 2019 season?

Every franchise they force their way out of is weirdly relieved once they’re gone, and nowhere they go ever wins: Neither Harden, KD or Kyrie has played in a conference finals game over the last four playoffs.

We’re just going to say it. Maybe it’s not worth having them around?

[READ: Where will James Harden go next?]

2. Daily GIF: Draymond can’t chug beer

Draymond Green has been outed as the second member of the 2017 Warriors to not be able to chug a Bud Light, joining Kevin Durant. 

3. Trivia time

Who is the only player to play high school and college basketball in the same state, while also being drafted No. 1 overall to an NBA team in the same state?

Answer at the bottom.

Hint: Recent.

4. An anon Twitter account is scooping Woj and Shams

An anonymous Twitter account named @droppingdimes20, which was deleted yesterday but has since respawned as @droppingdimes50, has been tweeting out NBA scoops for the past few days, often beating Woj and Shams.

Most notably, they tweeted out the Harden news -- along with speculation that the Clippers would be the favorites to trade for him -- an hour before either of the regular news-breakers. Then the black SUVs showed up and nuked the account.

He/she/person who hacked Woj’s phone is back tweeting news, though.

Take a scroll for yourself.

5. The worst fits in this photo, ranked

The legacy of Spurs Past comes down to two things: Winning constantly and giving zero fucks about anything other than winning. Those two attitudes led to five rings in 15 years and some of the worst fits of all-time, like in the pic above.

Fits in the pic, ranked from least bad to worst: 
 

6.  Quick Hits

• ESPN just fired Jeff Van Gundy, Jalen Rose and a bunch of other NBA personalities.   
• The recently-drafted Thompson Twins are two NBA-loving kings. 
• The entire NBA wants Bruce Brown on their team. 
• Kyrie Irving is leaking that he’s going to meet with the Suns, because he’s trying to drum up leverage with the Mavericks. 
• The Rockets are going to sign everyone tonight. 
• Ernie Johnson is going to the Sports Broadcasting Hall of Fame. 
• This will shock you: Ben Simmons has turned down another opportunity to play organized basketball.

7.  Reads

• "What's going on in Utah?": An oral History of Brian Windhorst's viral monologue [GQ]
• The 30-team guide to NBA free-agency [ESPN]
• Gregg Popovich is lucky the Spurs landed Victor Wembanyama. So are we. [Washington Post]

Trivia answer: DeAndre Ayton