SEATTLE • AUG 9 • MISGUIDED MEDITATION WITH MATT RUBY • LIMITED TICKETS • PROMO CODE “LUNGS”

Things are getting “weird”

“When they go low…” was very 2016. Now, taking the higher ground is for suckers. Gotta change with the times and we've entered the Age of Rage™️ so...

My first reaction: “Wait, is the Democratic party anti-weirdos now? Jeez, I truly am politically homeless.”

But why is "they’re weird" sticking? For one thing, that Stephen Miller guy:

Another reason: The art around the whole party is soooooo bad. For a bunch of godfearing folks, they sure consume godawful things. The outfits are tacky, Kid Rock is lame, their makeup is grotesque, and those Cybertrucks look like urinals. None of it is aspirational, it's just Waffle House meets Bass Pro Shop meets QVC.

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The party could level up and do a Mad Men martini vibe (that’s classic conservative, after all). But instead, it chooses to give conspiracy theory Real Housewives.

Or, to give another reality TV example, the left seems like Queer Eye while MAGA is the he-lives-with-his-mom straight guy desperately in need of a makeover.

Also, people sniff out hypocrites. The whole MAGA cult feels like a trickle down $60 bible con. Americans may be idiots as individuals, but, as a crowd, they possess wisdom. And plenty of us are tired of the flag pins worn by those who deny election results, VC’s who hate “the elites,” the pickup trucks that never haul anything, the "thoughts and prayers" families who send out holiday cards with their kids holding assault rifles, the working class heroes who give tax breaks to billionaires, and the hate-spewing accounts with "Christian/Husband" bios. After a while, it’s all a bit insulting.

Good weird vs. bad weird

But is “weird” the right term for these Roger Stoners? Some self-described weirdos on the left are pushing back because [Gordon Gekko voice] "weird is good”…

Look, I’m weird too. But also, I’m cool with it as a pejorative because hey, whatever works.

It does make me wish the word “freak” was used more though. Because that feels even more appropriate.

I’d sum it up this way: The weirdos on the left are out here calling the freaks on the right "weird" because it's the best way to get under their skin. That's because freaks spend their lives pretending they're not weird since, in reality, they're extra weird and very scared people will find out. Meanwhile, the normies are like, "Look, you're ALL weird!"

It’s all very, um, strange.

The empire tries to strike back

Meanwhile, Trump called Kamala a "California socialist." (Is that like being California sober? Because if so, that just means she's not really socialist.)

And Jake Paul is onboard…

…which is how I realized Jake Paul is Gen Z's Hulk Hogan.

They’ve also tried mocking Harris for her big laugh. Note: If you don’t like Kamala’s laugh, then I have some very bad news for you about Jeff Bezos.

And then there’s Project Special K (whatever that means):

It's like a game of Telephone. Next up: Some other mook posting to Truth Social: "I just heard Kamala is gonna force every Christian to do Ketamine!"

Give ‘em credit for getting wild though. It makes me feel like the left keeps bringing a knife to a gunfight. Libs are like "JD is weird" while MAGA is like "Kamala’s gonna have a Honduran shortstop sleeping in your bathtub."

Kamala goes brat

I wonder how Andrew McCarthy feels about this whole “brat summer” thing.

As for me, I refuse to figure out what it actually means, but I’m pretty sure this formula works:

Harris is definitely gonna pick a white guy. In fact, this is who they’re vetting now…

It feels odd that the VP pick "has to be a white man" and we're all fine with saying it aloud. I keep wondering, "Is this what the 1950s felt like?" Gotta admit, it's been surprisingly refreshing to be part of a publicly desired demographic. If this is what it feels like to be tokenized, sign me up!

Maybe I’ll even join the “White Brats for Harris” Zoom call that is probably coming. (Note: I will only pay money to not have to participate in a Zoom call with 10,000 people on it.)

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Cushion the blow

The Trump/Vance ticket really did deliver unity: The entire internet loooooved that whole JD-screws-the-couch thing. (All those couch puns really crowded out the Ozempic/Olympics joke avalanche I was expecting this week.)

It was like we all got the same joke writing prompt simultaneously. Look, ma!

JD Vance's mom: "Honey! They call it a loveseat, but that doesn't mean you actually..."

JD Vance: "Whatever. If they didn't want me hooking up with the furniture, then why'd they name the place DESIGN WITHIN REACH?"

Everybody who is anti-kinkshaming was out here mocking poor JD relentlessly. Hypocrites! Two consenting adults and/or pieces of furniture should be allowed to do whatever they want without this kind of mockery.

Cat ladies

And then there were the clips of Vance’s rants against childless cat ladies.

Gotta say, this exchange was superb joke structure from JD: "What do you have against cat ladies?" "That was sarcastic. I've got nothing against cats." 🤌

Reminded me of the Curb ep where Larry, when accused of being a self-loathing Jew, responds, “I do hate myself, but it has nothing to do with being Jewish!”

Anyway, lemme know if us childless folks get to pay less in taxes while the 1776 breeders get extra votes. Otherwise, I’m gonna resurface that “no taxation without representation” thing from you know when.

Patting myself on the back

Remember last week’s Rubesletter where I mentioned that whole bullet thing was very sus? Well, lookie here…

And then I begged for a JD Vance emo makeup tutorial. Huzzah. My prayers were answered.

I truly am a soothsayer.

What will I manifest this time? Hmm. As long as the whole “weird” thing is working, let’s have Kamala go full Mulaney and start calling Trump a horse in the hospital.

🐴➡️🏥🤞

FYI, gonna be experimenting with a new format for the Rubesletter upcoming. Stay tuned. And if you wanna support, please take out a premium subscription. You’ll get bonus content too.

Thanks for reading.

-Matt

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