Naismith Basketball Hall of Fame coach Chuck Daly always said, "Coaching at the NBA level is all about managing attitude, behavior, and performance."

But the truth is, this isn’t just about basketball—it’s about life.

No matter what industry we’re in, what title we hold, or where we are in our journey, we are all coaches in some way. Whether we’re leading a Fortune 500 company, a high school football team, or our own children at home, leadership is about influence. It’s about transformation. And to guide others effectively, we must first learn to manage our own attitude, behavior, and performance.

Yet how often do we pause and apply Coach Daly’s wisdom to ourselves? Who’s coaching the coach?

At The Daily Coach, we believe that everyone deserves access to a great coach. Since introducing this interview series in 2022, we’ve had the privilege of learning from some of the world’s most prolific coaches and thinkers.

For this week’s Saturday Blueprint, we revisit some of their most powerful insights—timely, timeless lessons to help us coach ourselves and others toward growth and deeper connection in the days ahead.

…

You had a great WNBA career, then were with ESPN, before becoming a Boston Celtics assistant. What was the key for you to earning the trust of stars in a short time?

I don’t know if I had a game plan. If you’re going to build a relationship with anybody, a coach, a player, a friend, a co-worker, it’s really important that you be yourself and you observe, listen and then find ways to add value and make that person better. 

I try to look at it like this. If you’re in the presence of someone and are able to make them better with your presence — you make them feel better, or you make them able to do their job better, or you’re improving them — more often than not, people want you around more. More often than not, people trust you. More often than not, people will give you more of themselves.

I don’t know if I did anything special. I just tried to get to know the players as best as I could and build strong relationships with them and not do it for anything other than that relationship. 

The other thing was when I was in Boston, I didn’t do any interviews. One, I don’t know if assistant coaches should be doing a ton of media interviews. That might just be a philosophical thing.

Everyone wanted to write stories about a female coach, and they had good intentions — they weren’t bad — but I never wanted the players to think anything was ever about me. I must’ve turned down 100 (requests). I’m not exaggerating. I did one or two because I think the Celtics asked me to do one for the team, maybe one other one, but every time they’d come to me, I’d say no. I never wanted the players reading an article about me. The articles should be written about them, not me. 

I do a couple more now as a Duke head coach, but just being honest, I turn down about 99 percent of inquiries because the story is not me. The story is our players, our program, and I always want to keep that in the center.

― Kara Lawson, Duke Women’s Basketball Coach

What were you good at early on as a manager and where did you find you really needed to improve?

As soon as I started coaching in the Minor Leagues, I realized nobody is going to let you coach them until they trust you. You have to have thoughts on how you’re going to develop trust. It’s not going to arrive at the same time for every player. I tried to ask players non-baseball questions. Where do you come from? What’s your dad like? Was it hard? Was it easy? Were you entitled? You ask those questions and start putting the pieces together, but it all predicates on trust and building the relationship.

The best way to initiate trust was to be vulnerable first, share things about myself and hopefully get their attention like, “O.K., he’s not B.S.ing us.” The magic is when they know you care about them as people, not just that they’re a middle infielder with first-step quickness and a barreled bat.

I got to know the players and my coaches, and they got to know me. Before you know it, you’re not building walls, you’re building bridges, and they can come to you with anything.

― Clint Hurdle, Former Pittsburgh Pirates and Colorado Rockies Manager

You ended up going to 19 straight NCAA tournament, including back-to-back Final Fours at one point. Beyond the obvious of skill or talent, were there any common characteristics of the great teams you coached?

Toughness. Mentally tough, physically tough, emotionally tough.  The other common thread was unselfishness in terms of “I’m having a crappy day here, but I’m not going to bring it into this gym because those people deserve better.” They were willing to say I know something’s going on, but I’m going to put “Me” over here for a minute and go be about “Us.” Those were clearly discernible in my best teams, even at the high school level.  Another easy to measure one was communication. My best teams were the ones that listened, heard and shared information.

They didn’t get angry at someone and put it over in a corner. They’d approach the person and talk about it. That doesn’t always make for a squeaky-clean locker room and picture-perfect practices. Sometimes, it’s messy, but that’s life.  Then, when they got on the court, they’d take this congealed version of themselves out because they had worked through all of that stuff before they stepped out there. If you unpack that a little further, that’s vulnerability and a willingness to be real with people, and love them, and let them love you.

― Sherri Coale, Author and Former University of Oklahoma Women’s Basketball Coach

How do you build a strong team culture, and why is storytelling so important when assessing and leading a team?

Culture is all about a story, and the storyteller must tell the story of us, not I. If you’re going to assess the team, you have to see yourself as part of it. If you’re looking down in judgment, the team won’t accept it. But if you’re looking down as someone trying to make the team better, you’ve got a better chance.

And how do you create that? Dr. Doolittle said it best: We may not look alike, but we just belong together. That’s the heart of it—creating a sense of belonging where no one is judged by money or celebrity. Instead, they’re judged by what they do for the team. You can’t assess a team until you create that sense of belonging. Without it, your feedback will feel like criticism, not coaching. People will think, Oh, they just don’t like me, or Things aren’t going well.

You’ve got to create a sense of belonging so people can take coaching, not criticism. Building a team is a spiritual challenge—it’s about creating a connection that’s bigger than any one person. It’s a profound communion between people, tied to a purpose greater than themselves. When you have that, you can assess the team. Without it, you’re building on shaky ground. You might be right; you might be wrong, but there’s no real foundation.

― Co-founder, The Daily Coach & GM of UNC Football

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