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Note from the Guest Editors
Hi
,
We’re Aminatou Sow and Ann Friedman, friends and coauthors of the new book Big Friendship: How We Keep Each Other Close (Surprise! It's GNI's August book club pick!). We are day one fans and readers of GNI so it’s surreal to be writing to you all as guest editors. It’s also kind of perfect, because our own friendship was founded on so many nights in.
In the book, we write about what a joy it was to get to know each other in the quiet, intimate spaces of our home. We lived in dingy Washington D.C. apartments, but we made decadent snacks for each other (Ann’s cheeseball is Midwest-iconic, and Aminatou’s queso is Texan perfection), watched so much trash TV (ahem, Gossip Girl and Jersey Shore—can you tell we met in 2009?), and spent countless, braless hours doing nothing on the couch. Well not nothing...on Sundays, we did the crossword side by side! Spending all this unstructured time together is how we first got obsessed with each other’s brains, and started to build the bond that has seen us through more than a decade of friendship.
In some ways, Big Friendship is a story we started telling each other on those first nights staying in together. These days we live on opposite sides of a continent and, right now, mostly see each other on FaceTime. But we’re still obsessed with each other’s brains. (Clearly! We wrote a whole book together.) And now, most importantly, we know that we have to work in order to keep each other close.
These days, few friends have the luxury of being in the same room; let alone sitting side by side. But this pandemic is a strangely wonderful time to be releasing a book about investing in meaningful friendships for the long term, because most of our lives have been pared down to the essentials. And for us, it’s never been more clear that friendships are among the core relationships that sustain us most. That doesn’t mean they’re uncomplicated or always easy—in fact, if a friendship is truly intimate it’s guaranteed to hit at least a few challenges and communication snags. The hallmark of a big friendship is not a lack of conflict, but the ability to address the issues that inevitably crop up between two messy adult humans who are just doing their best.
We hope you’re all finding your own ways of staying connected to the friends you love—even on your separate couches far apart. It’s hard work, but it’s so worth it.
See you on the internet,
A+A
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weekly picks
curated by Aminatou and Ann
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Big Friendship comes out next week, but you can order it now! (via @vivibookshelf)
- Our all-time favorite friendship snack you can make this weekend... 🍅 "Over the course of our friendship, we have eaten pounds and pounds of this delicious feta salsa. We sometimes call it the '90s Dip because the key ingredient is sun-dried tomatoes." - A+A
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Some of our favorite makers and friends... 🎨 "We love these gorgeous handmade ceramics and joyful prints, made by our friend Kenesha Sneed of Tactile Matter. We both have her work framed and sitting all over our homes. You can also often find us wearing the exceptional, plant-dyed apparel and natural fabrics made by our pal Miranda of Miranda Bennett Studio." - A+A
- Snag your copy of Big Friendship now...🌟 "Book of the Month does the research for you and picks five of the best new reads each month — like Aminatou Sow and Ann Friedman's debut book on friendship! All you have to do is select your faves and wait for that blue box to end up on your doorstep every month. GNI readers can get your first book for $9.99 with code NEW5 at checkout." - GNI Team #SPONSORSTHING
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The best gifts we've ever given each other... 😴 "This SleepMaster sleep mask is silky-soft, stays firmly on your head without pinching, and blocks out light while also muffling sound. It's one of the best gifts that Aminatou has ever given me, which is really saying something." - Ann
"This unassuming Casio Illuminator watch ⌚️(a gift from Ann!) is functional, robust, comes in fun colors, and serves as a great reminder that we can leave our phones behind when we're together without worrying about what time it is." - Aminatou
- For more books on friendship in adulthood... "Read Sula, a book about a complicated friendship between two women, written by Toni Morrison. We also can't recommend enough Sister Love: The Letters of Audre Lorde and Pat Parker 1974-1989. In it, two iconic feminist poets exchange letters over 15 years, covering everything from their work to the most intimate details of their lives." -A+A
- Meet your new favorite razor... 🛀 "With Athena Club's super close shave, it's no surprise their Razor Kit has sold out 5 times since launching. We also have our eyes on their body care and period products because they're all vegan and cruelty-free. Plus shipping is always free! Shop the Razor Kit for $9 here." - GNI Team #SPONSORSTHING
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About that friendship-catalyzing cheeseball and queso tradition we mentioned earlier... 🧀 "Elda Cullen’s cheese ball recipe is the go-to cheese ball in Ann’s family. Yes, the ingredient list sounds counterintuitive, but this spreadable dip is seriously addictive. Do yourself a favor and pair it with Triscuits. For Aminatou's queso, The Homesick Texan is a go-to for all best queso recipes. (Full disclosure: The two-ingredient recipe on the Ro*tel can is also the real deal. Secret's out! 😂)" - A+A
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sponsor spotlight: Misfits Market
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The funnier it looks, the better it tastes. 🍅
Or, at least that's what we think! Misfits Market is an entire experience in a grocery delivery box, complete with helpful tips, a cause worth caring about, and a smart way to cut your grocery bill.
Here's how the fresh, sometimes funny-looking organic produce finds its way to you: When organic farmers have extra or odd-looking produce, Misfits Market rescues these perfectly healthy (and delicious!) fruits and veggies that would have gone to waste and buys them at a deep discount. They pass on those savings to you — their organic produce is up to 40% cheaper than grocery store prices, and they also have deeply-discounted pantry staples you can add to your box. Along with your veggie haul comes an enthusiastic Misfits Market team, providing prep and storage resources and mouth-watering recipes on their socials, newsletters, and blog.
You can skip a trip to the store, save money, and feel good about supporting farmers while fighting food waste. GNI readers can get 25% off your first box with code GNI25 at checkout.
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read/watch/listen
what the GNI team is sitting down with this weekend
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What We’re Reading: 🤓
Phoebe Robinson Amplifies Diverse Voices With New Book Imprint, Essence
Is Hiking the Only Summer Activity That's Basically Still the Same?, The Cut
Say 'Yes' to the Dress Without Leaving Your House, The New York Times
Composting Food is an Act of Resistance, Zora
Fashion's Racism and Classism are Finally Out of Style, The Atlantic
My Relationship with My Daughter is Full of Love and Loss, Cup of Jo
What We’re Watching: 🍿
"I would just like to WHOLEHEARTEDLY ENDORSE the new Baby-Sitters Club series on Netflix. Yep, I'm just a 34-year-old woman laughing and crying and sobbing along with some middle schoolers. I'm halfway through and don't want it to end! I would also recommend reading this piece about how BSC raised a whole generation." - Carey, GNI Team
What We're Wearing: 🌿
"This week, I took an impromptu poll of the GNI team to find out what we're all wearing right now as we navigate these weird, work-from-home times. My findings: While many of us aren’t leaving the house much, when we do step out it feels like quite the adventure and our wardrobe reflects that. That means we've been swapping bike shorts and Teva recs all week, Olivia and Alisha are wearing these brights all day every day , Tyler's enjoying a new "light hiking" hobby in Chacos (now on sale), and I've made the switch to summer skorts (!!) and tie dye masks. We rounded up a bunch of our summer favorites here." - Katrina, GNI Team
What We're Making: 🥧
"We recently went blueberry picking so naturally, I had to make a pie with them. I cheated on the pie crust (store-bought ftw), but decided to get fancy by trying my first lattice crust on top. I found this neat trick on how to do it easily... which still involves a bunch of folding and unfolding." - Alisha, GNI Team
How We're Making GNI Better: 💫
"Our GNI 2020 survey is still open and we're excitedly working on things for the year to come. Would you take 15-20 minutes today to tell us what you like and what you want to see from GNI in the future? Your feedback makes us stronger every step of the way. 💪" - Jenny, GNI Team
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something exciting is coming...
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Something exciting is coming from the GNI team next week — now would be a good time to follow and keep an eye on@girlsnightinclub for more info. 😉
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GNI may receive a small commission from items you purchase from this newsletter.
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