Messages
5/13/2020
0 : 47
What A Day: The Great Kaine Robbery
Don't worry, we're still winning. Tuesday, May 12, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Trump's legislative lieutenant Mitch McConnell, on presidential etiquette Top health experts
5/12/2020
0 : 56
What A Day: Ain't vaccine nothin' yet
A beautifully layered grift. Monday, May 11, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Kevin Hassett, whose workplace is trying to force everyone else to go to work The White House spent the weekend
5/9/2020
1 : 6
What A Day: Sicko Miller, qu’est-ce que c’est
I want to rake freeee Friday, May 8, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -The president, when asked if he had a Mother's Day message The official US unemployment rate reached 14.7 percent in
5/8/2020
0 : 56
What A Day: The Age of Flynnocence
Even the Be Best-laid plans... Thursday, May 7, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Treasury Secretary Steve Mnuchin, tweeting a Liberian flag emoji at Axl Rose One of President Trump's
5/7/2020
1 : 16
What A Day: Oyez! Oyez! Bidet!
Maybe some Gray Mirror? Wednesday, May 6, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -A US Supreme Court justice, during oral arguments President Trump announced that his administration will continue to
5/6/2020
0 : 46
What A Day: Mr. Bright's side
June 6: The day we all cry to a YouTube video. Tuesday, May 5, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Elon Musk and Grimes naming their newborn human son, possibly for real The Trump administration
5/5/2020
0 : 46
What A Day: Dial M for murder hornets
Wear your button-down at half-mast. Monday, May 4, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Donald Trump (not assassinated), about Abraham Lincoln (assassinated) The Trump administration privately
5/1/2020
0 : 36
What A Day: Cuz I'm the vax man
Portrait of a Lady's Home Gym on Fire Thursday, April 30, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Chasten Buttigieg, on his journey of discovery since destroying Pete's hair Heads up: What A
4/30/2020
1 : 6
What A Day: High on his own Kush
Masks before snacks. Wednesday, April 29, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Jared Kushner, a man who for sure knows what success looks like More Americans have now died from the coronavirus
4/29/2020
0 : 56
What A Day: Commander in beef
Re-porking for duty. Tuesday, April 28, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -The New York Times, in reponse to Sean Hannity's 12-page tantrum With over one million confirmed coronavirus cases
4/28/2020
1 : 26
What A Day: Melania-collie and the infinite sadness
Only Brad Pitt may do doctor cosplay. Monday, April 27, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Mark Meadows's "biggest concern" as this guy's chief of staff Several more states
4/25/2020
0 : 16
What A Day: Lysol the President's Men
A flawless day. No notes! Friday, April 24, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Nancy Pelosi, more or less condensing this newsletter into 12 words The official US coronavirus death toll
4/24/2020
1 : 6
What A Day: Curious, Georgia
The BMX bikes are back. Nature is healing. Thursday, April 23, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Stephen Moore, economic advisor to the president and grown man More than 4.4 million Americans
4/23/2020
0 : 16
What A Day: Azar-y state of affairs
The plague mask's a little on the nose. Wednesday, April 22, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Deep Thoughts by Mark Warner channeling his inner Jack Handey The Trump administration
4/22/2020
0 : 46
What A Day: Bye-droxychloroquine
Finally, some global unity. Tuesday, April 21, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick (R-TX), back on his bullshit President Trump announced in a Monday night tweet that he
4/21/2020
0 : 46
What A Day: Crude awakening
The world's your oilster. Monday, April 20, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -The Last Dance's chyron for Former Columbia Student Barack Obama Over 40000 Americans have now died from
4/18/2020
0 : 16
What A Day: Libertweets and justices for all
Fetch the belt cutters. Friday, April 17, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Sean Hannity's master plan to reopen Yankee Stadium President Trump's vague guidelines for reopening the
4/17/2020
0 : 56
What A Day: Taking it on the Mnuchin
Just a big room of gold coins. Thursday, April 16, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Ivanka Trump, before traveling to a different state for Passover Millions more Americans lost their jobs
4/16/2020
10 : 32
What A Day: He WHO smelt it
Reruns are the real virus. Wednesday, April 15, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Betsy DeVos, on distance learning without internet access As governors get to work planning how and when to
4/15/2020
1 : 7
What A Day: The king's ransom
Nevertheless, Ticketmaster persisted. Tuesday, April 14, 2020 BY SARAH LAZARUS & CROOKED MEDIA -Our very own Captain Bligh President Trump has gone full despot in claiming that he has king-like