What A Day: Rattle Hymn of First Republic

Thursday, March 16, 2023

- Finally some fun in the Fox News chyron!!

More bank instability? In this economy??

  • Federal regulators working in conjunction with multiple Wall Street lending giants rushed to finalize a plan to stop the bleeding at First Republic Bank and stave off public fears of a 2008 repeat today. Eleven major U.S. banks pledged to infuse $30 billion into First Republic, to stabilize the market after the ripple effects from the Silicon Valley Bank and Signature Bank failures rattled smaller and regional banks. Regional bank stocks initially fell today but reversed course after reports of the deposit plan became public. 

  • In a joint statement, Federal Reserve Chair Jerome Powell and Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen said that the intervention from the group of large banks “is most welcome, and demonstrates the resilience of the banking system.” Not exactly how I would put it, but sure. Yellen worked closely on the emergency measure with the major bank CEOs and industry regulators, as well as with White House Chief of Staff Jeff Zients and White House National Economic Council Director Lael Brainard. 

  • Yellen also testified at a Senate Banking Committee hearing and defended the Federal government’s response to the collapse of SVB and Signature Bank. She faced questioning from members of both parties on the committee and asserted that the U.S. banking system is sound and that Americans can move forward with the confidence that their deposits are safe. However, she clarified that the emergency actions taken by the government with SVB and Signature bank should not be the industry expectation for all deposits. (I’m sure that’s their takeaway too, most definitely.) 

Yellen and other heads of America’s regulatory institutions are in the hot seat for the time being, but Republicans are, as usual, following their own deranged script. 

  • Under questioning from Republicans on the committee, who are feigning outrage corporate malfeasance, Yellen testified that a bank would only receive the kind of emergency assistance seen by SVB and Signature Bank if supermajorities of the boards of the Federal Reserve, the FDIC, and Yellen “in consultation with the president, determine that the failure to protect uninsured  depositors would create systemic risk and significant economic and financial consequences.” The decision to intervene with SVB and Signature was necessary, Yellen said, because “the chances of contagion that other banks might be regarded as unsound and suffer runs, seemed extremely high,” and the consequences of such conditions would be swift and very serious. (Sounds like the tech bros tweeting in ALL CAPS about the apocalypse that would ensue if they didn’t get a bailout had their intended effect.)

  • Republicans are, of course, also using this opportunity to pin the largest banking failure since 2008 on their favorite boogeyman: “wokeness.” Right-wing trolls on social media and their king, Tucker Carlson, claimed that SVB’s diversity, equity, and inclusion policies “distracted” them from, you know, banking and caused the crash. Yes, this is an argument people are trying to make. Not because of poor investment and risky strategies that depleted their cash stores and made them insolvent in the face of aggressive withdrawals, because of wokeness. Never mind that their executive team is, like most banks, is all White and mostly male! Obviously, there’s no evidence to support these claims, and it was a pretty classic run on the bank, spearheaded by the scourge of wokeness himself, Peter Thiel. 

Even conservative economists and analysts agree that the recent spate of bank failures stemmed from bank mismanagement and the recent financial woes of SVB’s tech and startup client base. But trying to misdirect public attention serves their dual purpose of furthering their hollow culture war while fending off the kinds of regulation that would prevent something similar from happening in the future. Great stuff!!

Move over, George Santos! There’s a new Republican fraudster in the House. Freshman Rep. Andy Ogles (R-TN) started a GoFundMe years ago, supposedly to raise money for a children’s burial ground, using an image of a stillborn baby on the page, and imploring “Help us help other families.” The page promised a “burial garden” featuring “a life-size statue of Jesus watching over the children” along with benches where families could sit. He raised almost $25,000. GoFundMe confirmed that Ogles received the money, but the park doesn’t exist, and he won’t say where the money has gone. In fact, he has patently refused to say what he did with the money, and is now naturally portraying himself as the victim, and released a statement saying that people should believe him that he used the money for the appropriate purposes, despite offering no proof.

Special grand jurors in Fulton County, GA, reportedly heard a third recording of a phone call disgraced former president Donald Trump made to a Georgia election official as he tried to overturn his 2020 loss in the state. 


Syrian President Bashar al-Assad met with Russian President Vladimir Putin and said Syria recognizes the territory of Ukraine the Kremlin has unlawfully annexed as Russian, and that Syria would welcome expanding Russia’s military presence there. Dictators are gonna be dictators, I guess! 


The Biden administration has called for TikTok’s Chinese ownership to sell the app or face a possible ban, a significant shift for the White House as it moves to address national security concerns about the app. 


Despite the Kremlin’s denials, the Pentagon released a video of a Russian jet dumping fuel on the U.S. drone that was taken down over the Black Sea earlier this week. 


French Prime Minister Elizabeth Borne used a special legislative procedure to advance an unpopular pensions bill through the French National Assembly without a vote, spurring calls for her resignation from the country’s parliament. 

Everyone’s favorite spiritual girlboss from the 2020 Democratic primary and Joe Biden’s sole 2024 challenger Marianne Williamson has been accused by former campaign staffers of abusive treatment replete with “foaming, spitting rage.” My third eye did not see this coming!

Unions representing more than one-million British health-care workers, such as nurses and paramedics, reached a deal Thursday to pause months of strikes, just days after U.K. treasury chief Jeremy Hunt proposed a budget that contemplates paying them a lump-sum bonus this year, and higher compensation next year. Strikes will be halted while members of the union rank-and-file vote on whether to accept the offer, which Prime Minister Rishi Sunak (whose personal wealth is greater than the Royal Family’s) has also endorsed. Thanks for your input, Rishi. The largest trade union in the country, Unite, lambasted the U.K. government for months of “dither and delay” that caused unnecessary hardships to staff and patients and said it would not recommend the deal, but that it supports members voting on it. Wages lagging record inflation is not limited to the health-care sector. Tens of thousands of teachers, civil servants, and workers in London’s subway system all walked off the job Wednesday. U.K. Health Secretary Steve Barclay said the department would look for cost savings and the funding for higher wages would ultimately be up to the Treasury, and would not come at the expense of patients. Imagine that!

Expert-recommended hair loss treatments - Keeps offers a simple, affordable, and stress-free way to keep your hair via personalized treatment plans that are recommended by a licensed medical provider and delivered straight to your door. With Keeps, you can get quality, expert care without ever visiting a doctor’s office or pharmacy. Keeping your hair shouldn’t be hard! That’s why they make it easy to subscribe to Keeps and get refill reminders, so you’ll never run low on the products you need to take care of your hair. 


24/7 care and support - Keeps has a network of expert medical advisors, prescribers, and care specialists to support you in making your hair goals a reality. Each treatment plan comes with a full year of unlimited messaging so you can connect with your medical provider about anything, anytime. 


Low cost – Treatment plans are affordable—typically half the cost of pharmacy prices.


Whether you’re looking to prevent hair loss, stimulate hair growth, or just take better care of the hair you have, Keeps has you covered.

Remember, prevention is key – treatments can take 4-6 months to see results, so act fast!

If you’re ready to take action and prevent hair loss, visit Keeps.com/world to receive your first month of treatment FREE!

Two reproductive health networks, Trust Women and Whole Women’s Health, announced that they will not immediately stop prescribing mifepristone if the Trump-appointed federal judge rules to suspend or invalidate its FDA approval. 


North Dakota’s state Supreme Court upheld a lower court decision to block a statewide abortion ban, saying that the state’s constitution protects abortion rights in some situations, meaning that the procedure remains legal in the Roughrider State. 


New polls show that 21 percent of Fox News viewers place less trust in the network since the revelations from the Dominion lawsuit, and 13 percent no longer believe the election was stolen after reading the leaked texts from Fox hosts and executives. 


Gov. Ron DeSantis (R-FL) reportedly once ate pudding with his fingers on a plane. Move over, Amy Klobuchar’s salad comb. 

Graduate Students at the University of Chicago won their election to unionize by a landslide.

. . . . . .

© Crooked Media 2023. All Rights Reserved. 
If you want to manage which emails you receive from Crooked Media, update your preferences here. If you prefer to opt out of all Crooked Media communications, you may unsubscribe.
Share this newsletter
7162 Beverly Blvd #212, Los Angeles, CA, 90036
Powered by Mailchimp

Key phrases

Older messages

What A Day: Suisse miss

Thursday, March 16, 2023

More banking turbulence, but this time make it European. Wednesday, March 15, 2023 BY JULIA CLAIRE & CROOKED MEDIA - January 6 insurrectionist lawyer Carol Stewart, talking about people who came in

What A Day: Krem brûlée

Wednesday, March 15, 2023

Russian aircrafts took down a US drone over the Black Sea, causing a foreign policy crisis. Tuesday, March 14, 2023 BY JULIA CLAIRE & CROOKED MEDIA - Brian Kilmeade touting the high standards Fox

What A Day: Sting like an SVB

Tuesday, March 14, 2023

The second-and-third largest banking failures in American history happened over the weekend - another huge win for deregulation!! Monday, March 13, 2023 BY JULIA CLAIRE & CROOKED MEDIA - Gov. Ron

What A Day: Yellen bloody murder

Saturday, March 11, 2023

The House GOP's Freedom Caucus introduced a slew of new demands to their debt limit hostage takeover. Friday, March 10, 2023 BY JULIA CLAIRE & CROOKED MEDIA - Tucker Carlson tackling the hard-

What A Day: Humble Bragg

Friday, March 10, 2023

Give Washington, DC statehood, you cowards!! Thursday, March 9, 2023 BY JULIA CLAIRE & CROOKED MEDIA - Rep. Debbie Wasserman-Schultz (D-FL) ripping right-wing grifter Matt Taibbi a new one Oops!

Nashville Shooting Fallout, Migrant Center Fire, and a Woolly Mammoth Meatball

Wednesday, March 29, 2023

Facts, without motives. ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌

☕ What really bugs us

Wednesday, March 29, 2023

Garçon, there's a fly in my fish soup! March 29, 2023 Emerging Tech Brew TOGETHER WITH Zendesk Welcome to Wednesday. May we suggest throwing some chill tunes up on your second screen and taking a

Republican Tells Lobbyists It’s “Hackish” To Blame Bank Failures On Deregulation

Wednesday, March 29, 2023

Patrick McHenry defends Trump's bank deregulation law days before leading an inquiry into the collapse of Signature Bank — his top donor. Republican Tells Lobbyists It's “Hackish” To Blame Bank

The dangers of Dollar General

Wednesday, March 29, 2023

Dollar General is one of the most successful retailers in the world. Last year, it recorded $37.8 billion in sales, up more than 10% over the prior year, and generated $3.3 billion in operating profit.

☕ Mammoth meatballs

Wednesday, March 29, 2023

Apple is getting into buy now, pay later... March 29, 2023 View Online | Sign Up | Shop 10% Off Morning Brew TOGETHER WITH Starbucks Good morning. According to the New York Times, there is apparently a

Numlock News: March 29, 2023 • Venus, Ridiculousness, One Hits

Wednesday, March 29, 2023

By Walt Hickey Venus Planetary scientists are furious at a NASA decision to yank funding away from a mission to Venus that had been slated for 2028 in order to redirect that money toward the Psyche

California gas price law - Pope Francis deepfake - Pentagon's abortion policy

Wednesday, March 29, 2023

Russian sports participation • Mexico migrant facility fire • Pentagon's abortion policy • California price gouging law • Pope Francis deepfake • 29 MAR 2023 View in browser The Factual Facts, not

The Government Is Making Telemedicine Hard And Inconvenient Again

Wednesday, March 29, 2023

... ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌

Nostalgic for VB? BASIC is anything but dead [Wed Mar 29 2023]

Wednesday, March 29, 2023

Hi The Register Subscriber | Log in The Register {* Daily Headlines *} 29 March 2023 Usborne intro to programming Nostalgic for VB? BASIC is anything but dead Microsoft's attention has moved on,

What A Day: Swinging for the Pences

Wednesday, March 29, 2023

The GOP is using the Nashville shooting as a tool of their war on trans Americans. Tuesday, March 28, 2023 BY JULIA CLAIRE & CROOKED MEDIA - Donald Trump, self-proclaimed foreign policy genius who