Issue #184: permission to feel two things at once 💓

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 issue 184 ~ week of August 28th, 2020
meet this week's guest editor: @minaa_b

Note from the Guest Editor


Hi ,

My name is Minaa B. and I’m a speaker, writer, and licensed therapist based in NYC. At work, I specialize in treating depression and anxiety, as well as childhood and racial trauma. I’m also a Lounger-in-Residence (a group of creatives, advocates, and experts who host gatherings for the Lounge community) with the GNI team. Above all else right now, though, I’m a human who's feeling the effects of this new world of COVID-19 and the many cycles of emotions that come with it.

We're all collectively going through a big change right now. And with big change often comes big (complex!) emotions, too. There are days when I feel grief while simultaneously feeling joy. Other times, I feel gratitude at the same time that I feel super annoyed that I have to wear a face mask. The duality of my feelings reminds me of my humanness.

Right now, it's not only possible, but likely you'll experience two seemingly opposite emotions at once. And if this is what you're going through: deep breath. There’s nothing wrong with you — you’re just feeling the effects of being a human who's allowed to hold space for more than one feeling at a time.

So what's someone to do with all these feelings? It's important to take time to reflect on them. Here are two of my favorite ways to show myself grace and unpack my feelings during this complicated moment: 

1. Commit to your journaling practice.
Write out your thoughts. Getting words on paper gives you an outside perspective of what you're thinking and feeling. When you're experiencing multiple feelings, write about each of them and what you think they're telling you. If your negative feelings are taking up the most space, sit with them and investigate what you need and what you can change. Think on how to implement boundaries and stay mindful of your triggers right now. 

2. Add affirmations to your daily routine, too.
Affirmations (like these) are ways we build self-esteem and self-confidence, which are both really important right now. When you're facing multiple truths, show yourself compassion and affirm your worth. Remind yourself what permissions you have when it comes to your feelings.

Here's a tip: I love writing affirmations on a sticky note, placing them on my wall and reading one each morning to start my day. Before bed, I’ll use that time to journal about the sticky note affirmation I pulled — and how it played a role in my day — as a way to wind down and get better sleep.

Collectively, we’ve never gone through something like this before, so sometimes emotions will feel complex or conflicting. Just remember, there's no right or wrong way to feel right now —we're just feeling our feelings and learning to respond to them one day at a time alongside everyone else. 

Journey well,
Minaa B.

Follow along with Minaa on Instagram or through her website.

weekly picks


what our team is recommending this week
we'd sit there any day (via @amiraelgawly)
  1. How we're making our money matter... "Subscribe to Solidarity is a movement that challenges people to turn their short-term donations to long-term commitments. How it works: Calculate how much you're spending on subscription services (Netflix, Hulu, digital fitness, etc.) each month, and then if you're able, match it with a recurring donation to an organization focused on social justice. Read more about it here." - Jenny, GNI Team
     
  2. If you're looking for a micro-project this weekend... "I've been seeing this DIY trend everywhere: apparently you can give old glass vases a ceramic makeover with just some paint and baking powder. I've been finding joy in the process of doing s l o w projects lately, so this sounds right up my alley — plus it's cost-effective and breathes new life into something you probably have in your home right now." - Jenna, GNI Team
     
  3. The underwear that our team can't stop talking about... 🌈 PARADE underwear is a frequent topic of conversation in the GNI HQ Slack — from their full range of colors to sustainable, supersoft fabrics, Parade has found a way to make comfortable underwear FUN. In eight styles that range from sizes XS-3XL, these pairs start at just $9. Want in? You can get 20% off 3+ pairs when you use this link.   #SPONSORSTHING
  4. To support the Postal Service... "This cause grows more important to me by the day, especially as mail-in voting will be a huge factor in this year's election. The good news is there are fun ways to support the USPS: Grab some stamps, treat yourself to some crisp new stationery or buy cards from a small business, get out your favorite pen, and make a friend's day with a short and sweet note letting them know you're thinking of them." - Alisha, GNI Team

  5. A soothing trip down memory lane... "A niche but wonderful corner of the internet I've been going down this week is the IKEA museum archive. You can look at any issue since 1950 here, and it's so interesting to see what's making a comeback right now and what definitely isn't." - Mary Anne, GNI Team
     
  6. If you're trying to shop secondhand from home... "Lately, I've been keeping an eye on @anxietymarketplace to shop more sustainably and make my dollars count. Plus, 20% of proceeds also go to a new cause each month." - Tyler, GNI Team 
  7. The teeny tiny best addition to my quarantine wardrobe... "If April was about tie-dye sweats, August is about these cute VOTE socks. Buy them, make a plan to vote, and talk to everyone you know to make sure they have one too." - Olivia, GNI Team 

sponsor spotlight: Welly

Small joys can make a big difference. 🚰

When was the last time you hydrated today? The team behind Welly wants to make taking care of yourself a little easier with their stylish, insulated, and infusing bottles and mugs that are made with real bamboo. A beautifully simple (and affordable!) water bottle can make a big impact on your physical health and mindfulness — especially in days like these.

Two more small ways that Welly makes a big difference? Helping to reduce our reliance on single-use plastic and making the commitment to donating 1% or more of sales to clean water solutions for people in developing countries. Shop Welly now and use code
WELCOMEFALL to save 25% sitewide through 9/7.

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read/watch/listen


what we're cozying up with this weekend
in the words of @mkoby_: resist, rest, repeat

What We’re Reading Online: 🤓
What Should a Museum Look Like in 2020? | Vanity Fair 
The Work You Do, The Person You Are | The New Yorker
Everything We Know About the Sports Strike | The Cut
Black Women Embracing Cottagecore is an Act of Defiance | Zora 
Ava DuVernay Interviews Angela Davis on This Moment — and What Came Before | Vanity Fair

What We're Watching: ❤️
Jacob Blake was shot in the back seven times by a police officer earlier this week in Kenosha, WI. His sister spoke to the media on Tuesday, and her words deserve your attention. "Don't be sorry — because this has been happening to my family for a long time, longer than I can account for... it happened to Emmett Till, Emmett Till is my family. It happened to Philando, Mike Brown, Sandra... I don't want your pity. I want change." Watch her two-minute speech here

What We're Listening To: 🎧
Know My Name author Chanel Miller describes her new podcast, Childhood, as "a gentle podcast where we talk about nothing." It's hosted by Chanel and her sister, Tiffany, and is endearing on a variety of levels. Their sisterly bond is very apparent, and their giggly moments are most delightful, like when they laugh hysterically about the colors they chose for their childhood bedroom walls. If you've got a special sibling relationship, you might take some extra joy and comfort from this pod.

What We're Cooking: 👩‍🍳

Looking for a quick and easy homemade sauce to get you out of the same old pasta routine? This low-effort and high-reward option will help you straddle that end of summer, early fall season for a few extra weeks before going all in on a winter's worth of decadent tomato sauces. Pairs well with rigatoni and a few episodes of The Great on Hulu.

heading into the weekend like... 

vintage GNI vibes (via @o.vuni)
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